Falling
by the.diversionist
Summary: After Zaheer wrecks Korra, Asami steps in to offer whatever support she can. Intended to fill in a few gaps from the end of Season 3, to the finale of season 4.
1. Chapter 1

Air Temple Island.

Asami fights the queasiness. Korra is alive. The poison is out of her. Zaheer nearly killed her but he didn't. She's stronger than that. Zaheer is a cheat and now he'll spend the rest of his days locked up, like her father. The world will be safe. Until the next crisis arises, anyway. And then Korra will be there to stop it. To save everyone.

Air Temple Island feels different than before. A somber quiet blankets the space. Meelo, Jinora and Ikki sit with the other airbenders. Asami doesn't know where Tenzin is. Or Korra's parents. Maybe they're with Korra. Maybe Asami won't get to see her.

It's been days since they returned. Korra slept the entire way back. Asami sat beside her when she could. Naturally her parents and Tenzin would be closest to her, watch over her. Of course. She took what time she could. She likes to think that Korra would appreciate it.

Korra needs her rest. Everyone kept saying that, even after the poison was out of her. She was so pale. Asami waited a day. She came and they said Korra was still asleep and not up to company. She came the two following days and was told the same. On the third day Tonraq and Senna let her in. Which is good, since she's fairly sure she can't wait any longer.

So much has happened. Asami needs to see her, look at her, be sure she's okay. Korra has to be okay. And if she isn't… _Then you'll be there for her._

She makes her way through the home. Pema points her in the right direction. It's the very room Korra led her to when Asami's father turned against her. Korra invited her to Air Temple Island despite the whole Mako situation. She's always been open and giving that way, completely selfless. Even after everything she's been through, she stays that way. She's always the better person.

Asami stands at the door. She's faced down Equalists and her father, the potential loss of Future Industries. Now she's frightened to open a door. It doesn't make sense. Korra is the Avatar. She's not normal. She's more. She can't be hurt. _Please don't let her be hurt._

Asami recalls how Zaheer thrashed the Avatar, flinging her from mountain to mountain, as if he were skipping rocks. He stole the air from her lungs. Anyone else would have been shattered but she survived. Asami reminds herself of what Korra survived to assure herself she's okay. _Take a deep breath and go in. She needs you._

_She's **fine.**_

Then why are the kids so well-behaved?

She slides the door open quietly. Korra is in bed, facing the wall. Asami closes the door carefully behind her and steps in. She considers leaving. She treads closer, kneeling before the bed. Korra is half covered in blankets. What isn't, is hard to see. She's bruised. Reds, purples, blues and greens line her arms. There are cuts everywhere. Asami swallows and forces her eyes to remain dry.

"Go away, Tenzin," Korra says. Her voice is weak, scratchy. "I don't want to talk."

"No, it's…" She doesn't know what to say. "It's me."

"Asami."

"Yes." She speaks quietly, worried that any louder might injure her further. "I wanted to come sooner…" she apologizes, "but everyone kept sending me away," she smiles. "I might have been overeager. But I was worried."

"Everyone's worried." The same flat tone.

"I'm so glad you're okay. I was so scared. Everyone was." She wants to reach out and touch Korra but doesn't want to alarm her, hurt her in some way. "You did it. You saved everyone again." Korra doesn't say anything. "Is there anything I can do? I can bring those steamed dumplings you like from the corner shop." She grimaces. "I might have, already." She sets the small container to the side. "Or tea…" she offers, feeling her face warm. "Or I can go." She doesn't want to offer that but it's only right to. "I bet everyone's been buzzing around you. And you must be so tired."

"Asami." Soft, drained.

Ever since they stopped dating Mako, they've grown so close. She never thought she'd be best friends with the Avatar. Team Avatar has gotten all of them through a lot of things. But what is friendship to an ordeal like this? Asami wants to think being near is a way of being supportive but how can she possibly know what Korra's going through? "I'll go," she says apologetically.

Korra makes a small sound, stopping her. Asami looks at Korra, her shoulders hunching closer together. "I can't stand. I can't walk. I can barely move. The healers…" She sniffles. Asami abandons any notion of leaving. She presses close to the bed, a careful hand to Korra's arm. "I don't know what to do. I can't go into my Avatar state. I'm so scared."

Asami tries to look at Korra's face but can't, it's turned down. Tears trace the curves along Korra's chin. Asami's eyes burn, her chin quivering. She keeps her voice steady through effort. The last thing she needs is Korra hopping out of bed to comfort _her_. "I can't imagine how scared you must be. But this is only temporary. Zaheer… he was a lot. But you're still here." She presses her forehead to Korra's shoulder, brushes a kiss to it helplessly. "And so am I. You're going to bounce back from this. And I'll help any way I can." A small gasp and Korra begins to cry. She trembles against her. Asami runs her fingers through her hair. "Just let it out."

* * *

><p>Asami all but moves to Air Temple Island. She arrives early in the morning and leaves late at night. On the nights Korra has nightmares, she stays. Korra's always embarrassed and says nothing is wrong but she talks in her sleep. She says things like 'no' before waking up in a sweat.<p>

The first night after Korra's had her nightmare, Asami returns with a wheelchair.

Tenzin frets._ We don't want her to think she won't get better._

_But she **will **get better. She just needs to get out of that room._

Korra looks at the wheelchair as if it were a dark spirit. _Why'd you bring that here? I don't need it._ Asami sets it aside in a corner of the room and they ignore it. But on a late night, with another nightmare startling Korra awake, Asami suggests they go out. _How?_ Korra snaps._ In case you haven't noticed, I can't walk._

Asami smiles and nods at the wheelchair, sitting up from the floor groggily and rolling it over beside the bed. Korra's face is sad and defiant in the pale moonlight that streams into the room. Asami sits beside her on the bed. "Hey. We don't have to use it. We can just sit here and talk. Or we can just sit here and not say a word. We can try to get some sleep. Whatever you want. I thought it might be good to get some fresh air. The stars are bright. It might be nice."

Korra glowers another moment longer. "Fine," she says resigned. They both look at the wheelchair. "I'm going to need help."

"All right." Asami lifts Korra's arm gingerly, wrapping it around her shoulder while securing her arm around Korra's waist. Korra looks unsure. "I'm stronger than you think, you know. And so are you. I won't let you fall." Korra looks at her. Asami smiles. "Trust me."

Seconds pass. Asami is still unused to seeing Korra with her hair loosed. She looks like another person. _She's not another person. She's Korra. She's the same._ "Okay," Asami says, "one. Two. Three." They lift. For a frightening moment, Asami fears she's lied to Korra, that she'll drop her, that they'll crash to the floor and Korra will look at her, betrayed and resentful, hurt at her own weakness, that she will need someone else to help get her up. _Push through it._ She does. Another few seconds later and Korra's in the chair. Asami's heart strains from exertion. "What'd I tell you?"

"I was pretty sure you were going to drop me."

Asami laughs. "Shows what you know. But you confirmed what I suspected: you're all muscle." Korra manages a weak smile. Asami steps back. "Is it comfortable?" Korra gives a small nod. She grabs her jacket and slips into it. "Okay. Let's head out." She's not used to pushing anyone around in a wheelchair. She nearly slams Korra into the door before running ahead to open it.

The wheelchair is greased and runs well. Korra is calm on the chair, unmoving, missing her usual bold energy. They both breathe deeply when they make it outside, as if having made it through some divine trial. In a way, Asami supposes they have.

The night air is cool and fresh. The stars are dazzling. Korra looks up at them. Asami keeps behind her, hands on the handlebars of the wheelchair. "Do you want to try?" she asks and shows her the handles on the wheels. "I bet you can outrace any one of my cars on this thing."

Another long silence passes. "I don't think my arms are strong enough to push it," Korra finally says.

Asami bites her lip. "I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking—"

"It's okay." She inhales slowly but folds over, a hand moving delicately to her ribs. Asami narrows her eyes. She never thought she could ever hate anybody. She disappointed her father that way, for not hating benders, but she hates Zaheer. Abhors what he did to Korra. "Asami…"

"Yes?"

"The stars _are_ bright tonight." Asami stoops, flicks the locks on the wheels and looks up at them. She notices Korra shivering and slips out of her jacket, wrapping it carefully around Korra's shoulders. "You don't have to do that," Korra protests.

"I want to." She sits beside Korra, pressing her palms to the ground behind her and staring up at the stars. "Otherwise you might get cold and go inside. Who else will I have for company?" The wind blows lightly. The wind chimes ring softly, as if in a song.

An hour passes, spent in comfortable silence. Korra breaks it, her voice unsure. "Asami?"

"Mh?" Korra's eyes are shadowed and listless. Asami can't remember the last time she saw them as they were, soothing blue, oceans with unfathomable depths. She seems so depleted. She must be thinking so much, feeling so much that she just isn't saying. Asami hopes she'll be able to confide in her, in anyone. Anything, as long as it helps her.

Korra stares down at her hands. "Nothing."

* * *

><p>Korra leans down from the bed, gently shaking Asami awake. Panic brings her to full alertness. She looks around and sees nothing wrong. She sits up from the sleeping mat. "What's wrong? Did you have a nightmare?" She usually hears when she does and wonders why she hadn't this time.<p>

"I'm going home."

"Home?"

"To the Southern Water Tribe."

Asami looks at her. Today Jinora became an air master. The ceremony had been moving but Asami sensed how uncomfortable Korra was. The politicians were out in full force. _She doesn't look well. How long has she been in that wheelchair? The world needs her and she's useless._ Tactless. Asami hopes Korra didn't hear but doubts it. It worries Asami that she might think any of it is true.

As soon as the ceremony finished, Asami pulled her outside. Korra had little to say. _I'm just so tired._ She rubbed her palm over her eyes. Asami saw but didn't comment on the tears streaking down Korra's wrist. _And everyone's so happy for Jinora and I'm selfish because all I keep thinking about is how I can't walk._

_You're the most selfless person I know._ She put her hands on Korra's shoulders. _You can't help how you feel. I know it doesn't feel that way, but you'll bounce back from this._

They hadn't stayed at the ceremony too much longer. Korra claiming she was tired and everyone knowing how likely it was to be true. Asami wheeled her to Korra's room, that had become something like their room. She helped her into bed. Korra doesn't ever meet her eyes when Asami helps her. There are other times, when Senna comes, that Korra wants Asami gone entirely. Asami leaves and chews on her lower lip. She can't imagine how frustrated Korra must feel.

"Did you hear me?" Korra asks.

Asami blinks and stares at her. "I… yes." She flicks her eyes away and they settle on the things she's brought: a record player and a collection of records Korra likes, fashion magazines and a box of engineering books that Asami reads when Korra's resting or having other visitors. She tries to bring what she can in, given Korra's exhaustion and limited mobility. She wonders if she was excessive. She can get that way sometimes. "Your parents will be so happy to have you all to themselves again." Asami feels Korra's gaze but can't meet it right away. She parts her lips but can't speak. "… I didn't even know they were planning on going back yet."

"It was sort of my idea." She goes on more quickly. "I've just been thinking about it. Mom and Dad keep going on about the Southern Water Tribe healers and… maybe it'll speed this whole thing up. Everyone can stop fussing over me."

"We want you to get recover at your own pace." Asami hopes Korra doesn't think she's been a burden. Nothing could be further from the truth. She can't stop fixating on the wrinkles in Korra's flat sheets. Korra's been thinking about leaving. For how long? Why didn't she say anything? It makes perfect sense. So why does she feel so… "Anyway… that's a great idea. … Do you want me to go with you?" Korra stares at her and Asami feels her face heat. "I know I've been spending a lot of time here. And maybe you need a rest from me."

"No, that's not it."

"So why don't I go? I can…" She can't say 'help'. She knows that. And looking at Korra's face, she knows that Korra knows she's thinking it. "It'll be fun. Like a vacation. The two of us. And your family." She takes Korra's hand. "What do you say?"

Korra slides her hand away hesitantly. "I'm sorry, but no." Korra doesn't look at her. "I know what I said about the healers but… I think… I just need a little time for myself. A change of scenery, I don't know." Asami nods. "Please understand."

"I do."

Korra talks to the blankets on the bed. "You're not mad?"

Asami kneels beside the bed and smiles warmly up at her. "No, of course not. You've had enough of us trying to take care of you. You probably know how to take care of yourself better than any of us. We all care. So maybe we're a little overbearing. Sorry. I can see how you'd need a break."

"Everyone's been so great. You've been so great. You haven't been overbearing. Not you."

Asami bites her tongue. She considers. "You know… you could have told me you were thinking about this. You and your parents have been so occupied. I'll set everything up, if you'd like."

"No. It's okay. I told Tenzin," she says apologetically, "he's taken care of all the travel arrangements."

"Oh, of course." She doesn't know why she sounds dazed.

"It's only for a couple of weeks. I mean, it's the Southern Water Tribe. Not a lot for a girl to do. Especially one like me." She smiles weakly. "I'll be back before you know it. I just… I've only told Tenzin. I wanted to tell you first. I know I should have said something sooner but… I don't know," she says quietly.

Asami covers Korra's hand again. "It's okay." This time Korra doesn't pull it away. "You'll be back before we know it." She wraps her arms around Korra carefully, feels Korra's chin on the crook of her shoulder, her warm breath tickling her hair. "I'm sorry if I was pushy. I guess… I'll just miss you. What's important is you taking time for what you need. The rest of us won't be going anywhere. We'll be here, waiting, when you return."

Korra's hand lifts, touching weakly along Asami's back, her fingers digging lightly. Asami doesn't know why she's filled with so much sorrow. It's only for a couple of weeks.

* * *

><p>AN: So now with Korra finished and my SHIP canonized (what!) I'm back to writing Korra fanfiction with a passion. Forgive any Air Temple Island layout weirdness.


	2. Chapter 2

Asami decides to take the little time that Korra will be gone to attend to Future Industries and the family estate. No matter the rocky times she's had with Future Industries, it's her company and it's up to her to see it succeed. She tours the warehouses. She knows they aren't where they should be—where she wants them to be, but in time, business will flourish. Things will feel right again.

She spends her evenings at the estate, frankly happy to have Mako and Bolin's family there. The estate is far too large for just one person. So much empty space makes her feel lonely, but despite the relative mirth that flows through the home, she can't seem to get her bearings. She stays up late, studying engineering books, creating designs. Her lines lack the angularity of before, the designs becoming swooping and soft. She wonders how Korra is and hopes she's feeling better.

Two weeks pass and a bubble of energy surges over her. She's not the only one. Everyone knows Korra's returning soon. Everyone is eager to see how she is. Three weeks pass and she still doesn't return. _She might have said a couple of weeks,_ Mako says reasonably, _but maybe she only meant 'a little while'._

Asami reasons that could be. Four weeks pass and she begins to feel somewhat anxious. It's silly. Things just feel different without Korra around. One late night, when the stars are particularly bright, Asami shuts the lights off in her room, deciding to write by candlelight instead.

_Korra,_

_I know Bolin has been writing you devotedly. To be honest, I didn't think any of my letters would arrive before you returned, which is why I hadn't written. I anticipate you'll be back before this one reaches you but that's okay. I'd rather see your face than have you read this letter. Things are quiet here. I've been a little bored. I've been taking the car out for lots of spins in the city. Mostly late at night. Lots of lights and empty streets. That feels more honest, somehow, than all the lively streets during the day. Mako's already hard back at work and Bolin is positively smitten with Opal. I don't see them very much—when you get back, we should all find the time to be together. _

_Anyway—I hope you're well. I'll see you soon._

_- __Asami_

Six weeks pass and she doesn't hear back. Mako and Bolin haven't heard from her either. Asami goes to see Tenzin, curious, and he tells her to be patient. _She's going through a very difficult ordeal._ Of course she is. Instead of being irritated at Tenzin for telling her the obvious, Asami's grateful to be reminded to not be so selfish. Korra will return when she's ready.

Two months pass and there's no word from Korra. Three months pass and still nothing.

_Dear Korra,_

_Maybe a 'couple of weeks' means something different for you than it does to me? I'm only teasing. Still… I did think you'd be back by now. Maybe you were wrong about the Southern Water Tribe, and you're having a great time. I hope that's the case. We've all been thinking about making time to come and see you. I know last time we talked, you didn't want that but maybe things are different now. It feels like it's been so long. Don't worry, we wouldn't come down without your say so. If I don't hear back from you, we'll stay here, no hard feelings. If you write and tell us you don't want us to come down—that's okay too. It would be nice to hear from you but I understand if you're not ready. Things are moving right along here. I know Mako and Bolin have been writing you, so I won't tell you what's going on with them. I know these letters are short, maybe a little meaningless. Life's just not as exciting without you around. I hope you're taking care of yourself. Please say hello to Tonraq, Senna and Katara for me. Kisses to Naga!_

_- __Asami_

Six months crawl past.

_Dear Korra,_

_I miss you. It's not the same in Republic City without you. How're you feeling? Things are going well here. I just got a big contract to help redesign the city's infrastructure, so I'll be keeping pretty busy for a while. Let me know when you're ready to come back. I'll clear off time on my calendar._

_- __Asami_

There's no word but the sting of disappointment when she goes to check the mail has started to fade.

Asami finds herself thinking of all the adventures Team Avatar had, how Korra always managed to pull through even when all hope seemed lost. For so long, everything was so scary. The Equalists, Unalaq, Zaheer and The Red Lotus. Enemies near, like her father and Varrick _I'm a business man, Asami! I was trying to get us business! No hard feelings!_ She considers herself a trusting person, but after her father, Varrick and the way he set Mako up, sometimes she's wary of trusting. Initially, anyway. It seems like one of the few people close to her that she hasn't questioned is Korra. She worried about her taking Mako before, sure, but she's the Avatar. How can she compare to someone like that? After they got to talking, it seemed stupid that they waited so long. She misses having someone to laugh with.

Things have calmed down. She should be relaxed but everything is flat and grey. She sleeps restlessly and takes to late nights and early mornings as a result. She throws herself into work. She's making Future Industries a company to be respected again. She writes Korra weekly.

Nine months pass.

_Dear Korra,_

_I can't believe it's been so long since we've seen each other. I've been thinking a lot about you. The car stalled the other day and I thought back to when I threw you the keys. I thought 'if I can do this, so can the Avatar' but you were horrible! I think your driving is the biggest menace Republic City has ever seen. Anyway… I can't imagine you'd be gone this long if you didn't have your reasons. I've been working really hard to rebuild Future Industries. My father has been writing me letters. They keep stacking up but I haven't opened them. I don't know that I can let myself trust him again. Even if I really miss him—or what I thought we were—I can't bring myself to forgive him for what he's done. Maybe it sounds hypocritical, but I hope that these letters aren't sitting unopened on your desk somewhere. If you've read a word, that's enough for me. My thoughts are with you, Korra. You wouldn't believe how much I miss you. I hardly believe it myself. _

_Sincerely, _

_- Asami_

A year passes.

_Dear Korra,_

_Hurry back to Republic City! Whenever you're ready, of course. I hope you're okay. I worry you might not be. I wish there was some way I could help you. And maybe you don't need help… I just have a hard time accepting that you wouldn't return if you were feeling okay. If you need _**_anything_**_, all you need to do is ask. I hope I'll see you soon._

_- __Asami_

The mailbox is always empty.

She lives, sleeps, breathes work, becoming as practical and efficient as any assembly line at Future Industries. Mako and Bolin's family scold her, tell her to get out there and be young. Men have always looked at her. She starts to realize that women look at her, too. Some stare a second too long, before smiling bashfully and turning away. So she dates but it just feels like another little job, one that she isn't passionate about. She gives it up soon.

Her letters become lengthier with the passage of time, small confessions. What else can they be when they're only one sided, when she doesn't get a response?

_Dear Korra,_

_I don't know where you are or if you're even reading any of these, but on the off chance you are, I'll keep writing, just so you know we're all still thinking of you. It's been almost two years but it's felt like a lifetime. I've tried to do some dating but none of it feels right. I find my thoughts drift away and I get bored. Maybe you're having better luck than me and that's why you haven't returned. I've decided to put dating aside to focus on Future Industries. Republic City's infrastructure is far more important and it feels good to contribute to it. This is__** our**__ city. You've saved us and this city so often, that it's the least I can do. Maybe I can give you a tour when you're ready to come back?_

_Yours,_  
><em>Asami<em>

She keeps writing. It's become habit even if she realizes she no longer expects a response. She no longer thinks Korra will return. Sometimes she wants to cry about it, usually late at night when the world feels so big and she feels alone. But she's so much luckier than others. Having been able to know her, as long as she did, is more luck than people get in their entire lifetimes.

One night, unable to sleep and tired of blueprints, she sits by the window and writes another letter.

_Dear Korra,_

_I wish I knew how to help__._

_I think with Mom's death... and it was just me and Dad, I became something of an overachiever. I put my mind to something and I wouldn't stop until it was done. I wouldn't stop until it was fixed. Maybe that's why I love machines and technology. You can pinpoint what needs attention and find ways to get it going again. Dad was always so proud of me. For my grades, for my fighting skills, my looks, everything. I worked really hard so I wouldn't let him down. I made goals and I met them. In a way, it's as if I was trying to make up for mom's absence by being the absolute best I could be. But you're not a machine. You're a person. An incredible person but people are more difficult to patch up. You're more than a goal. You're more than I can put into words._

_It's taken me a long time to realize that as much as I'd like to, I can't give you what you need._

_Maybe the answers are inside you. I must sound like Tenzin. Sorry. I know you'll say you no longer have the past Avatars but I'm talking about __**your**__ inner strength. I believe in you, Korra. We all do. Remember that._

_- __Asami _

It's the last letter she sends. She no longer has anything to offer.

* * *

><p>Weeks pass in a fugue.<p>

The Southern Water Tribe is frigid. It's fitting given how little feeling Korra has in her body. In a way, the numbing cold makes her body feel as if it is at home. But her mind feels different. Trapped.

She has no appetite. Little by little, the muscle she has goes away. She doesn't sleep. She wakes up screaming in the night. Sometimes she wakes up having fallen off the bed, face smashed against the cold floor. She lies there until someone finds her. She can't even get up. Sometimes hours pass. Her parents always feel horrible which makes Korra feel worse.

She's triumphant when after weeks, she's able to curl her fingers, if only a little bit. It means she's one step closer to being able to eat her own meals. The love with which her mother, father and Kya cut her meals into small pieces, sit patiently to feed her – she can't think of anything more humiliating. She's the Avatar, the world is continuing without her and she can't even feed or clothe herself, get around without anyone pushing the wheelchair.

It's the reason she left Republic City. She couldn't stand the thought of everyone who knew her as the Avatar, reduced to such a pathetic person. It's easier this way. If she's out of sight, she can be out of mind. They don't have to worry and they can go on with their lives instead of fretting so much about her. Everyone doted on her, especially Asami. She meant well but something about it left Korra feeling claustrophobic and panicked. Even if Korra appreciated her every gesture: getting her pro-bending magazines, tuning the radio in to matches, bringing her a drink when she was thirsty. Korra never asked for any of those things and still, Asami seemed intuitively to know.

Having Asami around when her mother had to come in to help her change or bathe was mortifying. And Asami was so patient. She never pushed, she never questioned, she just left when Korra snapped at her to. Everything was so right and so wrong in one that Korra had to go.

She said a couple of weeks but it's been longer than that. Mako and Bolin write but over a month has passed when the first letter from Asami arrives. Her mother opens the envelope for and sets the letter on her lap for her to read after Korra declines having her read it. Korra will take any opportunity to do the little things she can do and is happy when her mother exits so she can read the letter in private.

The letter makes her cry. She's been doing a lot of that lately. Sometimes it's the pain. Other times she feels sorry for herself. She's disappointed so many and now, she's lied to Asami about when she would return. _See you soon_, Asami said. No. She can't go back. Not yet. Not so soon. Not when she's still so useless and crippled.

If she goes back, she knows how it'll be. The kids on Air Temple Island being quiet and well-behaved. Mako and Bolin being polite as they gather around for tranquil tea parties and Asami gently reminding them that Korra is too tired for any hang outs to continue much longer.

More weeks pass, more letters arrive. She's gained enough strength to be able to maneuver the wheelchair a few inches. The effort leaves her exhausted and winded but it's something and now she can go out to see the colorful waves along the skies, the stars that burn so bright. She thinks of the night Asami took her out to see the stars and all the things she still feels but couldn't say.

She practices picking up a pen and making her fingers curl around it. It's different with eating utensils. There's a crude way you can hold them and still be able to eat but penmanship requires more refinement. It isn't much but it's all she has. She practices, sometimes for hours at a time until her hand and fingers hurt. Eventually, when her handwriting no longer looks like a child's scrawl, she tries to write Asami.

_Dear Asami,_

_I'm sorry I didn't get back when I said I would. Things could be better here but I really miss all of you. I don't know if I'm up for seeing everyone—but maybe, if you have time, you could come see me. I'm just so tired all the time—_

She doesn't send it.

She worries Asami will cease writing her letters but they continue steadily. They quickly become the best part of her week and she devours the words, smiling when Asami lands business contracts, guilty, when Asami continues to quietly wonder when Korra will return, how she quietly implores without outright asking.

_Dear Asami,_

_I wiggled my big toe! I know that seems like nothing but it's a pretty big deal! Katara's been helping me but I'm still not where I'd like to be. I tried to walk today and fell on my face. I've only been able to get a little bit of strength back in my arms and using it, even for a second completely exhausts me. Thank you so much for your letters. The Southern Water Tribe is great but pretty dull. Your letters are the only entertainment I get. Thanks for the Fire Ferret Magazines and movers! I wish I could hit the pro-bending arena again but I just don't have it in me. I'd like to head back soon but I'm worried—_

She doesn't send that one either.

Months pass. A year passes. A year and six months. Her strength comes back gradually but she's still haunted by that dark Avatar. In some ways, it's as if the poison never left her at all. She didn't win the fight against Zaheer, no matter what anyone says. She battled and she lost. How can the world trust her again? Everyone is moving on, everyone is helping the world while she learns to take baby steps.

Mako and Bolin's letters start to come less seldomly, eventually spreading out to weeks and months but Asami's stream of letter writing is fairly consistent. She writes late at night. She talks about Future Industries and the progress she's made, how Republic City is shaping up—how Korra will have to come and see the park, because it's looking better than ever.

Asami worries for her and Korra worries for Asami. Korra worries at how lonely she seems, frowning, without meaning to, when Asami talks about dating. Smiling, ironically, when Asami questions whether Korra has been more successful. She's been a recluse and her mom and dad tease her about whether she's lost her ability to speak, some days she's so quiet.

_Dear Korra,_

_Maybe I should stop writing you. Maybe I should take your silence as a hint that you don't want to hear from me. Maybe I'm being selfish but it's hard for me to accept that we could ever really stop talking, that you could stay away forever. I think I'm just having a hard time letting go of you. _

After that letter Korra fears that Asami will stop writing altogether. The panic keeps her up later than usual, her appetite reduced to nothing, nerves taking hold of her. Some nights she leaves the home and takes the letters with her. She reads the letters over and over. They're a connection to Republic City and to Asami. As long as the letters continue, things can't ever really change between them. They can't be lost.

The panic subsides when Kya waves a letter cheerfully at her. Korra almost lunges at it, stealing it and running off to her room to read it in private. Asami hasn't given up on her. Asami is still writing her. She reveals more than she has. In some ways, Asami is so reserved. Korra likes that about her. They balance each other out. Asami is cool and stoic no matter the pressure. Korra is hotheaded and throws furniture around.

Still, Asami's letter leaves Korra concerned and elated.

_You're more than a goal. You're more than I can put into words.__ It's taken me a long time to realize that as much as I'd like to, I can't give you what you need._

Korra reads the letters until they're soft around the edges. She continues to train and slowly, her body returns to fighting shape. She isn't as strong as before. Something is missing. As she is, she can't return to Republic City, despite how desperately she wants to go. She couldn't take down the training team when Tenzin came by. No matter how much she's progressed she still has so much further to go.

Weeks pass in silence and she gets no letters from Asami, despite the occasional one she'll get from Mako and Bolin. At first she assumes the letter has been lost but as more time passes a panic grips her that makes it difficult to breathe. Some piece of her feels even more fragmented than before and she realizes that Asami has given enough. She's attempted to write letters and none of them felt right. She tries again one late night, exhausted and unable to sleep.

_Dear Asami,_

_I'm sorry I haven't written to you sooner, but every time I've tried I don't know what to say. The past two years have been the hardest of my life. Even though I can get around fine now, I still can't go into the Avatar state. I keep having visions of Zaheer and what happened that day. Katara thinks a lot of this is in my head, so I've been meditating a lot. But sometimes I worry I'll never fully recover. _

_I've been thinking a lot about you, and all the crazy times we've had together. Thank you for everything you've sent me. All of it has kept me from going stir crazy. I've read every one of your letters and maybe I took it for granted that you would always write, which is pretty dumb, given how busy you are. It sounds like you've been doing some really great work with Future Industries—which is a surprise to no one. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner how much I appreciated you taking the time to write. Your letters have meant everything to me. _

_No dating here. I've spent every waking second training and trying to get back to what I used to be. It's slower going than I want and I feel like the world is just moving ahead without me. I'm sorry for not coming back sooner. I've just felt so lost and I didn't want you to see me the way I was—I didn't want you to think differently of me._

_I'm hoping that if I continue to meditate and train, I'll be able to go into the Avatar state again and everything will return to normal. I really miss Republic City. I really miss __**you**__. I think I'll go back soon. There's no reason I can't continue my training there. Maybe you're thinking 'you said a couple of weeks before' but this time it'll be different. You don't have to send a response. We'll see each other in person before your letter gets to me. I can't wait for us to be able to talk, face to face. _

_Clear some time off your calendar for me?_

_Please don't tell Mako and Bolin I wrote to you and not them. I don't want to hurt their feelings but it's easier to tell you about this stuff. I don't think they'd understand._

_Love, _She strikes the word out.

_Korra_

She reads and re-reads the letter and wonders if it's heavy handed. In a way, it feels good to just put it out there and be vulnerable—even if it's the very reason she left Republic City. When writing, you have to overextend because you don't have your face, your voice, your touch, to communicate.

It'll be fine. She sends the letter and the next day she tells her parents she intends to return to Republic City. As soon as she's said it, she's certain it's the right decision. It's been nearly two years and a half years. Enough is enough. Maybe she's become stagnant in the Southern Water Tribe.

The journey to Air Temple Island is good. The waters are calm and the sea animals come out to play.

It's only the stop at the sea side village that puts a damper in her spirit. She begins to wonder if she made a mistake, returning so soon. The two thieving benders beat her so easily it's humiliating. _Are you sure she's the Avatar? _Korra stares blankly at the fishmonger and old woman until they finally pull her to her feet. "Sorry," she mutters, "I'm a little rusty."

Her appetite gone, lobster cabs forgotten, she returns to the small boat and continues to make her way to Air Temple Island but with every inch of ocean that is crossed, she feels her courage falter and wonders if it was only desperation to not lose something that prompted the trip. Still, the sight of Air Temple Island, Republic City behind it, alight, makes her heart stir and she can't help the grin that comes to her face.

How can she feel like she's returning home after just having left it? The lights, the music, Air Temple Island, everyone is within reach! Her cheeks flush in anticipation, an energy she hasn't felt in so long easing back into her.

It's only when she sees the avatar, that dark spirit, mirror image of herself, eyes aglow, chains clinking in the darkness, that the heat slips away from her and she goes cold, lets out a small gasp, physically backs away. _Push through it, Korra. Fight her. Win this. You made a promise. _

But she can't. The air is gone from her lungs. She turns the sail, shifting directions, away from Air Temple Island, away from Republic City, away from Asami. Korra fights the burning in her eyes. Weak. She hasn't grown at all. She's lied, again. _Go back. __**I can't go back. **_The smaller Air Temple Island gets, the easier she can breathe. _Coward. _She bites her tongue. She can't deny it. She should have known she'd just disappoint them.

* * *

><p>AN: So wow, everyone! Thanks for the faves, follows and reviews! They're super encouraging. It's heartening to see everyone love these two like I do. This chapter turned out a little longer than expected, so apologies for that. And any weird time wonkiness. I had to sort of make do from the ten whopping minutes dedicated to three years. In my head I imagine the title of this chapter as 'Korra and Asami unintentionally write love letters'. The lack of 'strikethrough' on this site is really annoying. Imagine a strikethrough where Korra's 'love' was. And all her other letters. The site has also been formatting my chapters all weird, so you may notice some edits as I catch things I might have missed the first go through. Forgive me for extending Korra's letter! I did it on purpose but it feels wrong to mess with the glory of the writers. Next chapter, reunion! In theory, anyway.


	3. Chapter 3

Korra's letter leaves Asami in better spirits than she has been in years, even if some part of her feels guilty, given how difficult things for Korra have been. The others speculate to the reason for her newfound mood. Mako's grandmother has her own theories. _She's got herself a secret boyfriend stashed away somewhere. It's about time. Mako, dear, is it you? _Asami scratches at her neck gingerly while Mako turns beet red and stammers. _For the last time, grandmother, Asami and I are not dating. _The grandmother looks to Asami for confirmation. Asami shrugs helplessly in return. _Been there, done that, _she mutters under her breath.

Asami clears off her calendar and works long days and nights to make up for her upcoming absence but Korra doesn't return. Asami tells herself she's miscalculated the journey time. Maybe there's been bad weather. She looks into the weather but sees nothing to indicate that treacherous weather was at work. Maybe Korra left later than anticipated.

_You don't have to send a response. We'll see each other in person before your letter gets to me. I can't wait for us to be able to talk, face to face. _

Asami couldn't wait either. She hasn't sent a letter. She refuses. Some piece of her believes that if she does, she'll somehow undo Korra's promise. She reads the letter until she's memorized it and tries not to stare at the word, hastily scribbled out, before Korra's name.

A month passes and Asami accepts that Korra isn't returning. Korra must have her reasons but those reasons doesn't make her absence any less gutting. Asami returns to work and apologizes for the meetings that were put off, the deadlines that had to be pushed back. She's angry at herself for believing Korra would return and then angry at herself for not believing she would. She sits at the drawing board at her office in Future Industries, the paper blank, inspiration lost.

She turns sharply when she hears a noise. No one should still be here. She relaxes when she spots Mako. "Hey," he smiles and brings her a container of food. "Stopped by at your place earlier. When they said you weren't in, I figured you'd be here."

"Republic City's number one detective," she smiles tiredly and takes the food with her thanks. She hardly ever sees Mako anymore. She hardly sees anyone that isn't a co-worker or city representative. "What's going on? Is something wrong?"

"Besides everything?" he grumbles and pulls up a stool beside her own. "I've been taken off the force. To guard some future king Wu of the Earth Kingdom." He crosses his arms, eyes rolling up in his head for a moment. "I'm one of the best detectives in the city! Agh, it just seems like such a waste of time. You should meet this guy. He's a spoiled brat. Real pain in the ass."

"How long are you protecting him?"

"Until the coronation," he growls again, "that's half a year away!"

"It'll pass before you know it." Time's funny that way. The past two and a half years have flown, despite how agonizingly long they've felt. "And then Republic City will have their hotshot detective back."

Mako gives a lopsided smile. "You always know how to make me feel better."

"When we're not dating, maybe." He gets tense the way he usually does when she mentions that time. It's strange. Her interest in Mako, Korra's, the failure of those relationships is what ultimately drew her and Korra together. She slaps his leg gently, picking up a dumpling with the chopsticks. "I'm teasing."

He grunts. "Anyway, I didn't come here just to complain. I came to see you." She arches her eyebrow and he looks at her for a long time. Asami eats the dumpling while he thinks of whatever it is he has to say to her. She hadn't realized she was starving until the first bite. When was the last time she ate? "What's going on with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean—well. You took that impromptu vacation, right? And for a while there, it seemed like you were on top of the world. Hey, is grandma right? _Are _you dating someone? Did you break up? You can tell me."

"What?" she nearly drops the food. "No."

"No, you can't tell me or no, you're not dating anyone?" Mako stares at her. Asami stares back. "I don't know, it was just good to see you that way again. Something's been off with you these past few years. I don't see you all that much, but I see you enough to notice that." He crosses his arms again and gives her a hardboiled detective stare.

Asami is momentarily flustered. "It's…" she narrows her eyes. "Nothing," she says softly. "I was just… I had a good feeling that maybe Korra would come back."

"What?" he sits up straighter. "Was she? How? Why? Did she write you? Why would you think that?"

"Breathe between questions, Mako," she mutters.

"Did she tell you she was coming back?"

She averts her eyes. "No." She's never been a particularly good liar but Korra asked her not to say a word and so she won't, even if it means lying. Maybe she's only sparing Mako's feelings, as Korra suggested. Maybe she wants to keep their exchange secret. "It's just been so long. I thought… I hoped it was time."

Mako watches her. Finally he turns, his fingers touching on the drafting paper of the drawing board. "I miss her, too." He shouldn't believe her. He's a good detective. But he wants to. Asami knows he does and he doesn't press further. She's grateful.

* * *

><p><em>Dear Asami,<em>

_I'm sorry I lied. I didn't mean to. I set out the following day after I sent you that letter. Air Temple Island was in sight but… I couldn't. I guess, no matter how badly I want to, I'm still not ready to return to Republic City. I'm sorry it took me so long to send this letter. I was hoping… that I would find something, anything, that would help me get back to myself and that way, I could just show up at Republic City and surprise you. But I haven't found that thing yet. Maybe I need Zhu Li on the case? Anyway—I don't know what to say. I'm sorry if I disappointed or hurt you. I wish I could be better._

There's no return address.

Asami's fingers tighten over the letter, the words on the paper becoming hazy.

* * *

><p>Another five months pass. Life is proceeding normally. Asami's at the ribbon cutting ceremony, turning away the advances of the obnoxious Wu (poor Mako), when Mako tells her the news. Korra will be returning that evening. Lin Bei Fong told him. Korra hasn't written to tell her she'd return, but if Lin told Mako, it must be true. Maybe she plans to surprise her, just like the letter said. It's one surprise she doesn't mind having ruined. Asami can't help smiling. Like before, she's overtaken by a surge of adrenaline, her heart rate spikes. "I can't wait to see her."<p>

Like before, Asami's disappointed. Korra isn't here. Korra has been writing letters to Tonraq and Senna, telling them how good it is to be back in Republic City with her friends. Asami is somewhat glad she didn't write Korra and ruin her cover. Regardless, the festive mood of the evening quickly sours at the revelation.

Naga whines. Asami pats her head. "I know," she soothes.

Mako paces the dock after everyone's moved along. Asami lingers close. "I mean, what kind of game is she playing?" he asks. "Why would she tell Tonraq she's been here when she hasn't? She's been gone for six months, doing who knows what!" He kicks a bucket off the pier.

Asami watches it fly and land hard in the water. "Mako, calm down. We're all upset."

"What if something's wrong and she's not okay?" he asks. Asami bites her tongue. Korra isn't okay but it isn't anything she knows how to explain. How could she when even Korra doesn't know? Even if she had the ability to explain it, she couldn't. It's not her story to tell. "What if something's happened?"

"She'll get through it. She can get through anything." It's easy to say. She's said it to herself thousands of times already.

He rears on her angrily. "How can you be so calm? Why are you not more upset?"

"I am upset!" she snaps. "I miss her and I'm sad and I'm worried! But none of that will bring her back!" None of that has. Mako looks like a kicked puppy and then, ashamed at himself. Asami sighs tiredly. "I didn't mean to yell at you. I'm just…"

"I'm sorry. You're right. I'm being a baby about this. I think I just miss Bolin and Korra. I didn't expect either one of them to be gone this long. I didn't mean to take it out on you." He touches a hand to her shoulder. "Korra's tough. Where ever she is, I'm sure she's all right." Asami glares at the pier. When he hugs her, she hugs him back. He chuckles softly. "Man, you've gotten tall."

"You're just used to spending your time with small princes." Asami steps back, somewhat heartened. "Well… you've got to get back to Wu and I have some work to do."

"Why don't we grab dinner? Wu will have to come but—"

Asami shakes her head, walking away from him. "I can't. There's a lot to do." She has to be alone tonight.

* * *

><p>Korra's back.<p>

Really back.

They say she's back.

Jinora calls her out of the blue to tell her the news, how she, Meelo and Ikki were sent on a top secret mission to find Korra. And they did find her! And she's back! "I thought you'd like to know_,_" Jinora tells Asami, a hint of smugness in her voice. She's never taken that tone before and Asami doesn't know why she's taking it now.

"Ah, thank you," Asami holds on to the table beside the phone for support, looks at her stunned reflection in the glistening redwood, her knees inexplicably weak. "Thank you." She hangs up in a daze before calling back. Jinora picks up. She wonders if this is a dream, if any of it is really happening. Is Korra really back? After three years has she finally returned? "Ah—would you ask her," she doesn't know why she simply doesn't ask to speak to her, "would you ask her if she'd like to have lunch sometime this week? With me. And Mako."

Jinora calls the question out but no matter how Asami strains to hear Korra's response, her voice, she can't make it out. "Korra says she's on for the lunch date." Jinora informs her chipperly.

"Oh." She doesn't quite believe it.

"So, reserve a table or something and leave Mako at home."

"What?" Jinora hangs up on her. What?

* * *

><p>Some part of her still doesn't believe it. It's been three days since Jinora told her the news. The part that does believe Jinora, keeps her up at night, gives her a near manic energy that is draining to everyone around her. She won't believe fully believe it until she sees Korra. Korra hasn't come to see her, after all, and Asami worries if visiting Air Temple Island will prompt Korra to remember the reason she left in the first place. Asami doesn't think she could take it if she showed up to Air Temple Island and Korra was gone without having said goodbye.<p>

So she works diligently. She reserves a table at the restaurant and invites Mako to the lunch, despite Jinora's curious suggestion that she leave him home. Mako needs to be there. He's missed Korra a lot and he might be a buffer. Asami isn't sure she trusts herself to not dissolve into a mess at seeing her. _If _she sees her.

The night before the dinner, a wave of exhaustion comes over her and she crashes early. She's not sure if it's the result of having let go of a good deal of the anxiety that has festered within her during Korra's absence or the way she has been tirelessly working for three years. She sleeps in for twelve hours and jumps out of bed the following morning, late for work, no, nearly late for lunch.

She dresses, ties her hair up, pays special attention to her reflection before leaving home. The hostess tells her Mako has already arrived and is waiting for the table. Korra, however, hasn't. Asami takes a seat and tries to steady her nerves. She picks up a magazine at random but can't focus.

She only halfheartedly turns at the approach of footsteps.

"I hope you haven't been waiting long," Korra says.

The air goes out of her. It's her. It's really her. Asami stands, setting the magazine aside. "Only three years," she smiles, goes to Korra, throws her arms around her, has to, to confirm that she's here, that it isn't a vision, some hallucination. Korra squeezes her back as fiercely. To see her again after all this time… Asami closes her eyes. Swallows. Breathes again. She can breathe again. "I'm so happy to see you."

"Me too," Korra says, then, just as quickly, "about you, I mean."

Asami laughs softly but she doesn't let her go. She doesn't know how long they stand locked in each other's arms. Not long enough. Asami slides a hand down to the small of Korra's back, a hand still wrapped around her neck before they pull away from each other, or try to. Korra's hands settled on Asami's waist at some point. She looks up at Asami, her smile as bright as anything. Their eyes meet and after a moment they both laugh nervously before separating.

"I'm loving the hair," Asami takes the time to really look at her. It isn't the only thing that's different about her, but it's the most obvious. She looks older. They both are but it's more than their age. Korra touches her hair bashfully, her cheeks reddening. Asami notices, doesn't notice her own heart skip a beat.

"Thanks." Korra stares at her, before a soft smile touches her lips. "You're looking snazzy, as always."

Asami smiles. "Come on, Mako's reserved a table for us." She doesn't know why she says that.

* * *

><p>Korra looks around the table.<p>

Okay. So not the way she planned for their reunion to go. Together only minutes and they're already fighting. So much for self-growth. Korra wonders why her foot couldn't have grown big enough for her to not stick it in her mouth. Maybe if Prince Wu hadn't shown up and said the stupid thing he did, Asami wouldn't have even thought to ask about the Avatar state.

As it stands, Korra's explanation hasn't helped things. Mako is looking at them suspiciously before angrily turning his gaze on Asami. "I asked if she'd written you and you said no." There's a moment, his brow crinkling. "Did Korra tell you she was coming that one time you took vacation?" he demands. Korra freezes up. Asami stills, her eyes narrowing gently. "Is that why you thought she was coming back? Is that why you were so—"

"Mako, I'm sorry I lied," Asami says before he can go further. Korra wants to roll it back. Is that why Asami was so what? "This is exactly the reason why we didn't say anything."

"'We'? Did you write often?" he asks.

Asami says "No" when Korra says "Yes".

They look at one another and Korra's shoulders slump. She received a lot of letters from Asami but her own correspondence was lackluster at best. It's strange being back. Everything's different. Mako combs his hair. Asami is even taller. There's a tension between them that wasn't there before. She isn't sure if she's glad that Mako came or not. Even with this argument she's still unsure, and that's just weird. She's tired of not knowing. "Mako, back off," Korra says. "Look, I'm sorry, this is all my fault. I didn't know what to say to you. I just… I just didn't know what to say to anyone. I barely wrote Asami," she grumbles. "I don't want us to fight. Can we just… just catch up? And talk about what's been going on? I'm back now," she smiles at the group but Asami's brow is furrowed, she doesn't quite look at her. Korra bites her tongue. "So… Asami—I mean… what's up? Are you taking over the world with Future Industries yet?"

"Not quite," Asami says. Mako crosses his arms, glaring at everything and nothing at the same time. _Jeez, Korra. You've really screwed up. You have to fix this. Try to not say anything too stupid for the rest of lunch before these two kick you out of Republic City. _ "I kind of have some big news," Asami continues, "I went to visit my father for the first time. He'd been writing me letters and… I guess I finally felt ready to try and forgive him."

"He's still writing?" Korra asks.

"What?" Mako snaps up to alertness again. He looks to Korra and then to Asami. "Did Asami tell you that? How long has he been writing?"

"A while," Asami says uncomfortably.

"I am loving this lunch," Wu tells them. "But my delicate bladder is tiny. Mako, escort me to the bathroom. Your future king demands it."

"You're not my future king," Mako shoots him a look before ignoring him. "I thought we were friends, Asami. I've been telling you about how I'm all messed up from this Bolin thing—why couldn't you have confided in me? Don't you trust me? I thought things were good between us. It's better to write to someone who isn't even in the city? Someone you hadn't seen in years?"

Asami only looks at him but Korra notices her fingers curled delicately into fists in her lap. She says nothing. Korra hates this. Is all this fighting her fault? Did they hurt him by confiding in each other? Why's it a big deal? There are things he can tell other people he can't tell them, she's sure of it. If only she could explain it to him but she doesn't know how. She can't tell him about all of Asami's letters, the words that wrapped like some spell around her, the way she pushed her out one night when she could barely move to see the stars. How does she say any of that? "She thought I was coming back sooner," Korra defends.

"So Korra _did_ tell you she was coming back," Mako says to Asami.

"I really need to go to the bathroom," Wu complains.

"Go by yourself! I don't need to be there to see you empty your royal bladder!" Wu skulks off. Mako fixates on Korra. "You couldn't even say hello? After all the letters Bolin and I sent?"

Korra's face heats. "I guess I couldn't." She just couldn't. The restaurant patrons are looking at them. Korra thinks back to minutes ago when she saw Asami, when they embraced and for a split moment, all the years between them disappeared, everything was at peace and in balance. Now everything's gone out of whack and Korra isn't sure how to get things back in order. Story of her life. Maybe she's a lousy Avatar. "Guys," she says, "can we stop all this fighting and talk? What Asami just said is a pretty big deal. Look," she turns to Asami, "I know Hiroshi's your dad and all but are you sure you can trust him? What if he's just trying to manipulate you again?"

The flash in Asami's eyes is enough to make Korra regret the words. "You think I don't know what my own father is capable of?"

"No—" she puts up her hands defensively, maybe trying to stop Asami's anger, "I— I didn't mean—"

"You don't get to disappear for three years and then act like you know what's best for me!"

The words sting. Asami has a point. Of course she has a point. She's not used to seeing Asami so fired up. To seeing her angry. To being the one responsible for it. "It's not like I planned to be gone that long. I wanted to come back but I never felt ready until now."

"Is that why Jinora, Ikki and Meelo brought you back? Would you have bothered if they hadn't found you?"

Korra locks up.

Mako scowls and gets to his feet. "I'm going to check on Wu. I'll let you two finish catching up. This lunch has been real swell."

He leaves. Korra bites her lower lip. Asami looks sad. So much for not saying anything stupid. Korra plants her elbows on the table, hands in her hair. "I've screwed everything up. I'm sorry." Minutes pass in silence and Korra's guilt mounts. Maybe she shouldn't have come back. Things are different. And maybe they could have been different in a good way but this isn't. This feels awful. Everyone's fighting because of her. That's like, the opposite of what the Avatar should do.

"It's all right," Asami finally says, touching a hand to her shoulder. "Hey…" Her voice is soft and lulling. Korra tears her attention away from the spoon in front of her and looks at Asami, as difficult as it is without feeling ashamed. "I'm sorry I got so heated. I'm _so _glad you're back. You came back your way." Asami palms her face. Korra's cheeks heat, her heart thrums. "That's all that matters." Korra licks her lips, her mouth gone dry. They both look away at the same time. "We should probably check on Mako and Wu. They've been gone a while."

Korra downs her glass of water, the others, and follows after her.

* * *

><p>AN: I feel like I'm updating this too quickly so sorry if I'm flooding inboxes! Forgive any month wonkiness. For whatever reason my head is having issues wrapping around the timeline. Also, I'm aware I changed the lunch around a bit. I wish the show had had the time to make it longer! I usually put up behemoth chapters but I figure more manageable chapters and frequent updates is better? Thanks for the faves, reviews and follows!


	4. Chapter 4

The sun starts its descent, beginning a close to their tumultuous day.

Wu has been rescued and like with so many others, Asami opens her home to him. _You sure you want to let that guy live with you?_ Asami returns Korra's question with a helpless shrug, an easy smile. Korra wonders if Asami knows any other way. Sure, Mako offered the home to him without so much as asking Asami, but there wasn't even a moment of hesitation for her. Korra wonders if Mako knows Asami so well or if it's only natural to assume that she would be willing to help. Both seem reasonable assumptions.

The three of them dawdle on the estate's porch. Once again, there's a nervous energy between them. Mako breaks it first. "With my grandmother fawning over Wu, this is likely the only break I'll get from him for who knows how long," he looks between the two of them. "Thanks for helping me find him. I don't think my career could have survived losing the future king of the Earth Kingdom."

"It was fun," Asami says. "Three years apart and only three days to get back in on all the action."

Mako grins. "It sure was boring without you, Korra," he looks at the two of them and clears his throat. Korra wonders if he's going to salute. "I uh—I should go."

"Already?" Asami takes a hold of his sleeve as he's heading down the steps. Korra glances away. "It's early. We could try for dinner?" she looks at Korra.

"Oh—yeah, I'm game." It's the least she could do for the way she ruined lunch and possibly their lives for the last three years.

Mako shakes his head. "Nah, I'm going to try to catch some down time while I can." His eyes shift between the two of them before he _does _salute, a small smile on his face before quickly turning on his heel and taking the steps down to exit. "I'll see you two later."

They watch him go. What's going on with him? Asami takes a breath, clasping her hands together in front of her. The setting sun makes her skin look radiant, strands of her hair as if they're flecked with gold. "Looks like it's just you and me."

There's a sudden roar of laughter from the home before Mako's family bursts into song. "And half the Earth Kingdom." She digs the toe of her boot into the ground. "You want to get out of here?" Asami's face is reserved. Korra doesn't ever remember seeing like that. Have they just changed? She seemed more comfortable when Mako was near. Mako and Asami have grown closer. Maybe he knows Asami better than she does now. "We can go for a ride. You can give me that tour you promised."

A hint of surprise touches her features. "Okay, yeah. That sounds great."

* * *

><p>They drive for hours through Republic City, Korra insisting Asami tell her everything about her work and designs. Asami does, moving them over the streets Korra's spirit vines wrecked and Asami's company reconstructed. She tells her about the structure, how it all maps together like a system of roots throughout the city. Korra doesn't understand it all. She's pretty sure Asami's a genius. A genius who cleans up the messes she makes.<p>

Asami has one hand on the steering wheel, her other arm draped casually alongside the door of the car. Korra can't believe she ever thought her prissy. All this stuff is second nature, like a second skin to her. Korra watches her profile, the way the wind pulls through her hair. As much as the car contraption confounded her in the beginning, Korra appreciates it now. This vehicle was crafted by Future Industries, no doubt some design of her father's that Asami has expanded on. The vehicle is clear blue now. Water Tribe colors. Not the red she remembers. _It doesn't mean anything._

Korra closes her eyes, relaxing in a way that she hasn't for too long. For minutes she sits that way. It's like flying. Only the sudden sharp turn of the car righting itself back into its lane makes her open her eyes. Asami doesn't look at her. "Something on the street," she mumbles, the night air making her cheeks rosy, "sorry."

"It's all right. Can't risk ruining your precious car." Asami floors it. The engine roars, the wheels peeling across the streets. Buildings zip by in a blur. Korra grips the car door and braces herself. "Hey, that wasn't a challenge!" she has to shout to be heard.

Asami smiles. "Can't handle it?" She looks at her and Korra wants to tell her to keep her eyes on the road. She doesn't. "I want to show you something."

* * *

><p>They walk through Avatar Korra Park. It's one of the few areas where the night sky really shines, and above them, a tapestry of stars seem to burst with light in the darkness. Korra looks around. It's crazy that a park was named after her. Still, it looks <em>amazing. <em>Asami designed this park. Asami had it named for her. Korra's sure it had to go through all kinds of city boards and maybe a fight with President Raiko but that it was her doing… She glances to Asami beside her, who walks with a peaceful smile on her face. She catches Korra watching her and her smile shifts. Korra nearly runs into a bench.

"What you've done here is incredible," Korra tells her, once she recovers.

"You think so?" Asami crosses her arms and stares up at the Avatar statue. Korra looks at it. That's her. Younger, bold, more confident, maybe. "I had a little inspiration." Korra can't think of anything to say. She's pretty sure she's forgotten how to speak. Take that, Tenzin. "So. Back in Republic City for a few days and you've already saved a prince. That confirms it. The Avatar is back."

"I had some help," she shrugs. It's great being back in Republic City, like finally things are returning to normal. "It felt good being with Team Avatar after so long. I _can_," she says softly, maybe bashfully, "go into the Avatar state again. You asked, earlier? Before… everything… turned into a big mess."

"You can?" Asami laughs, takes Korra's arms. "That's great! I was worried—but I knew you'd get back to yourself! I didn't doubt it for a second!"

"Thanks." Asami's enthusiasm is genuine, contagious. Korra is left feeling as if she were bundled up in a warm blanket. It's too easy to smile around her. Asami's as excited as she was to get back to her Avatar state. "But maybe you doubted other things?" Asami tilts her head slightly, studying her. "About what you said earlier… I know I can't make you believe it, but I really was going to come back. Even if the kids hadn't come for me." She throws her hands up helplessly. She straightens her back and looks at her. "Well?"

"Well?"

"Nothing. I don't know what I'm expecting from you," she paces. "This whole mess is my fault. And I want you to believe me but I don't blame you for not believing me. I'm just irritated at myself."

Asami considers. "Well…" she walks alongside of her, "I believe you." There's a beat. "I'm sorry about earlier. I was frustrated."

"I don't know how it happened. I never, ever meant to be gone that long."

"What matters is that you're back now." She takes Korra's wrist briefly. "The rest of it doesn't matter."

"How can you be this good to me?" Korra asks. "You sent so many letters and it took me years to get back to you. And the one time I do—I don't even follow through on what I said I would!"

"Why are you angry?"

"I'm not!" Though she has raised her voice. She doesn't know the reason for it. She sits on the bench. Asami sits beside her. "Or I am. Not at you. At me. You wrote me. You supported me and you never asked for anything." Asami smiles faintly. "What?"

"When have you ever asked for anything? All you ever do is give."

"So do you." Korra retorts. It seems stupid to argue about which one of them is nicer, though Korra believes it's Asami. "Anyway," she tries to win the point, "I took your boyfriend. So sometimes I don't give. Sometimes I take."

Asami laughs, "How'd that work out for you?"

Korra scowls. They were a terrible couple. All they ever did was fight. Things were better for a while, after he stopped being so awkward around them and now it looks like it's back to business as usual. "Mako was pretty mad." About the letters. "In his Mako way." He's always been a little awkward about discussing feelings, having an easier time fighting than talking. Maybe that's why they didn't make it. They were too similar.

"He'll calm down."

"I know I was a jerk. I don't even know how to explain it to him. I don't get why he's mad," she crosses her arms, jutting her lower lip out.

"I think he's been lonely. Because of Bolin?" Asami bumps her shoulder gently with Korra's. "Friends get jealous, you know." Korra thinks briefly to Asami's letters when she mentioned dating, the way she took Mako's sleeve. "Anyway, I might have been upset if you wrote to Mako and not me."

"I didn't. I wrote _you_."

"I know," her eyes light, another smile on her lips that makes Korra wonder if she's hungry or needs to throw up or is faint. "Thanks."

"I'll make it up to him."

"You will. So… when's your big date with Wu?"

Korra's eyes widen, sputtering. "What? That guy? No way. Why? You interested?" Asami's eyes settle on her. A question. Korra doesn't immediately remember what the intention had been when she asked. "Because I'm not. In Wu," she blurts out. "I'm not interested in Wu."

Asami reclines against the bench. "That makes two of us. He's so annoying. Can you imagine that guy running the Earth Kingdom?" Korra frowns. She can hardly imagine kings in the Earth Kingdom at all. She wasn't able to stop Kuvira, even with her Avatar state. What use is an Avatar who can't answer the call when she's needed? After everything she's survived, why couldn't she take her out? "What's wrong?"

Korra takes a breath. "I mentioned training with Toph earlier." Asami nods. "Long story short, I still had poison inside of me from… from everything Zaheer did." Asami carefully touches a hand to her arm and Korra briefly forgets the terror of the poison sinking into her skin. "She tried to remove it but it was too painful. She thought I was keeping it inside me so I could have an excuse to not be the Avatar."

"That's ridiculous."

"No – I mean… I appreciate it," she says quietly. "But in the end, I think she was right. I've failed so many times. I keep thinking—shouldn't the Avatar be stronger? Shouldn't they be able to take care of themselves? I kept everything Amon and Unalaq and Zaheer did trapped inside of me. I mean, those are a lot of the nightmares I kept waking up from." She bites her lip.

"I thought as much," Asami shakes her head gently. "I mean… from before."

Korra nods. "I still have those nightmares. Not as much as before… but just as bad." Asami turns to face her on the bench, taking hold of her hand. "Toph said I had to learn from my enemies and let go of them. Face my fears. Realize that those fights were over. And I did. I must have. I was able to get the poison out and I was able to go into my Avatar state."

"But…?"

"But it wasn't enough. I didn't even _want _to fight Kuvira. I only did it when there was no other choice. I thought—fighting has rarely made things better. I was scared… and I thought—that maybe there was another way. But there wasn't, so I fought. And I lost. She was ready to kill me."

"And then what happened?"

"I went into the Avatar state. It didn't feel right. But I didn't have a choice or she would have taken Zaofu by force. But even that wasn't enough. I – I nearly had her. But then…" she stops, huddles over herself, fingers curling and pressed to her forehead. Even with Asami she can't talk about that thing she keeps seeing. "I'm still not well." Her words are unsteady. She takes a moment and finds the strength to even out the words. "I still haven't fully recovered. I don't know what to do. She's a threat and I can't stop her." For a moment she doesn't know whether she means Kuvira or that dark spirit. Both, maybe. "I feel like such a failure."

"You're _not _a failure," Asami's hand touches on her back gently, soothing. "You'll get back where you need to be. You just need to be patient."

"Okay, Tenzin," she shakes her head and looks sidelong at her. She sighs. "Maybe you're right."

"Sometimes I am."

"Toph said… Toph said part of the reason I hadn't recovered was because I'd been disconnected for too long. From myself. From the people who love me," she can't keep her eyes on Asami. Her neck feels hot. Every piece of her feels like gelatin. "Maybe she's right. Maybe in time…" Asami's hand keeps its gentle rhythm along her back. Korra tries not to fall asleep to the soothing ministrations. Everything feels better now. "I'm sorry about earlier," she sits up slightly and is disappointed when Asami's hand falls away, "about what I said about your dad. I had no right."

Asami's lips thin. "It isn't anything I haven't told myself. I still want to try. He's my dad." She narrows her eyes. "I know what he did was awful. Maybe it's stupid."

"It's not stupid," Korra takes her hand and lets it go just as quickly. "I was only worried. I … don't want you to get hurt again. I know how difficult things were when everything with the Equalists went down. So I opened my mouth without thinking. I'm pretty good at that. Pretty great at that, actually."

"You're 'pretty great' at lots of things."

"Yeah, says who?"

"Me."

Korra smiles. "Um. Yeah. Thanks. You're pretty great, too." It isn't exactly what Asami said but it'd be just as stupid to take it back. She doesn't want to take it back. She nervously tucks a lock of hair behind her ear. Asami's gaze makes her feel as if she's on fire. A panicked, excited feeling races through her. Fight or flight. A feeling like that but more. Something better. "It's … a pretty warm night. Don't you think?"

"Yeah," she agrees.

"Um—so we've been together all day. It's past midnight. You probably have a pretty early morning. Running Future Industries keeps you busy. I mean, everything you've done with this entire city… It must be…"

"Must be…?"

"Um…" she can't think. _Must be…_

The distance between them vanishes, somehow. Asami's leg brushes against Korra's. Asami's face, flushed even in the darkness, is near. Korra grazes her fingers along Asami's cheekbones, the curves over her jaw, her contact beckoning and then their lips brush, together they heave a soft sigh, whisper things that the other swallows before it can be heard, and then they're close, and everything is fire and air, electricity, in one. For once she doesn't feel as if she's in a perpetual fog. She's grounded. Who did it? Korra wonders. Who kissed who?

Their mouths meld together, Korra pulling Asami near to kiss her deeper, Asami's fingers skim along her hair, along her arm, and they kiss until Korra's senses go and she has no more air to give. Their lips separate, both of them trembling, breath no longer their own. Korra is dizzy, surprised. Asami looks the same. "I'm so glad you're back," Asami breathes again.

"Yeah," Korra can barely manage words, "I'm glad to be back."

* * *

><p>AN: Apologies for edits to canon. I keep switching things around for my story purposes. No worries, paradise is not near. This is me so expect some misery. I'm thinking this will update every two days or so (but don't hold me to that). Another chapter's already been written. Maybe six or seven in total? I know this was a dialogue heavy chapter but this was stuff I wanted to see Korra and Asami talk about on the show. Once again, massive thanks for the reviews, faves and follows!


	5. Chapter 5

"That was some lunch," Jinora quips as soon as Korra returns to Air Temple Island. So much for sneaking in. Jinora peers out from behind a sliding screen door, beaming. She whispers to keep quiet. "How was it?"

"It was lunch." A messy, chaotic lunch. "Isn't it way past your bedtime?"

Jinora looks at the clock on the side table. It reads near two in the morning. How did it get that late…? "Did you get to spend special time together?"

"Special time? What?" Korra hates how hot her face feels. "Go to bed!" Korra shuts the door on Jinora before she can ask any more questions. She moves at a brisk pace to her room. The more she lingers the bigger the risk that Tenzin or Pema can interrogate her. She throws herself onto the small bed and folds her arms behind her head. She needs rest.

She hopes the nightmares won't wake her. It's rare to make it through an entire night without some horrible vision making her heart pound until she wakes in a sweat. She thinks of Asami and hopes she has better dreams than she does. She braces herself for the nightmares but her thoughts are in a flurry and she doesn't sleep.

* * *

><p><em>The desert night is surprisingly chilly. They flee, leaving the city behind them, Mako and Bolin fighting to stop Ming-Hua and Ghazan, fighting to buy her time to get Korra away. The desperation is thick in the air as Naga races further into the endless sea of desert. Asami steals a glance back, wondering how close her pursuers are, hoping against everything that Mako and Bolin are safe.<em>

_She clings to Korra's body, fighting her muscles that strain to hold her in place, keep her from slipping off Naga. They only need distance. They only need enough time to hide, enough time for Korra to wake up._

_The sand rumbles and flies. A shot of fear courses through Asami when the first stone spike juts from the ground, she tries to get Naga to turn around but soon two more walls rise, enclosing them in darkness. Her breath comes too fast. Naga whines. Asami holds tightly to Korra as Naga spins in slow circles and pushes against the walls to no avail. The earth shakes._

_"Come on, Korra," Asami whispers fiercely, tapping her face lightly, "wake up. Wake up. Please wake up."_

_Minutes later one of the walls comes down sharply. The whistle of darts and Naga takes two paces before slumping to the ground. Asami doesn't have any air in her lungs to shout. A row of soldiers stand outside. "There's the Avatar!" One of them says._

_Asami slides them off Naga as best as she can, reclining Korra against the polar bear dog. "Who are you?" she demands. Their faces are blank and they race forward. Asami leaps, legs wrapping around the shoulders of one soldier and flinging him against the wall. Another rushes at her, she dodges his swing, striking out with a fierce blow. He falls back. That's when the first chunk of rock slams into her. She stumbles hard into a wall, and pushes off it, despite the excruciating pain in her arm, followed by a worrying numbness. _

_The moment is all the opportunity the soldiers needed to seize Korra. Asami shouts and lunges forward. One of the soldiers turns and slams his baton into her temple. Everything goes blurry. She takes a few steps before crashing to the sand, her vision hazy, watching helplessly as Korra's feet drag through the sand, still asleep, no longer protected. Where are they taking her? What will they do with her? Asami's fingers claw at the grains of sand, burying, trying to crawl forward before everything goes black._

_Her fault._

_Korra's body flies. Zigs here. Zags there. Slams into the stone ground. A cloud of dust and she doesn't move. Zaheer stands over her. Asami watches below. Useless. Zaheer picks up Korra's body, the strongest person Asami knows and throws her down to them as if she were nothing._ **_You can have your Avatar. _**_Korra lands with a crunch. She's grey. She's poisoned. Suyin leans over her, hands waving over Korra's body. Asami can't breathe. Suyin's face is strained and white. __**I can't get it out,**__ she says fearfully, __**I can't get it out.**_

Asami shoots up to a sitting, breathing hoarsely, looking wildly around her. The room is dark and for a moment she's petrified that she's trapped in the desert with Korra and they've been captured again by the Earth Kingdom. Her fingers shake. She's in her room. Not the desert. It's a nightmare. The same as before. Memory and fears intermingling to torment her. There is no desert. There is no Zaheer. "She's all right," she whispers. She's all right.

Her heart hammers and no matter how she tries, she can't get to sleep. She turns on her side, fingers curling carefully around the pillow, trying to get her breath. _Korra's all right. She's not poisoned. She's fine. _And still, some piece of her can't let go of that fear.

* * *

><p>It's a beautiful day in Republic City. Air Temple Island is alive with energy. A pleasant breeze teases at their hair. Jinora, who hovered around too long, finally grows bored and takes off. <em>What's with her? <em>Asami asks, bemused. _Bratty teenager, is my guess, _Korra returns. There's _no way _she's going to get into what Jinora's been teasing her about.

The tea and small lunch they shared in the gazebo has been set aside, Korra opting to engage in a sparring session rather than quiet conversation. It's hard to be still around her. Korra hops in place, warming up while Asami straps the arm pads onto her arms. Korra shoots her attention to the sky when Asami catches her looking at her. _Relax._

"Try and take it easy on me," Asami says, getting into a defensive stance. "We haven't done this for years."

"Luckily for you I'm not the Avatar I used to be."

"Come on, don't say that." Before Korra can respond, Asami swings. Korra smiles, falling back, half turning to deliver a brutal punch to the pad. Asami laughs warily, stumbling away. "Seems to me like you've still got your old moves."

"Maybe I'm just trying to impress you." She leaps before Asami has the opportunity to respond. Asami feints left and Korra's kick flies harmlessly through the air before she lands. When she turns, Asami is smiling, a hand beckoning her close. Kuvira flashes in Korra's mind and she loses her footing.

"Are you okay?"

The air is chilly. "Fine!" Toph told her to let go of her old fears. She has to get back to what she was. She has to find herself again. She was once smarter, daring, braver, fierce. She uppercuts one of the arm pads off Asami before kicking the other free. Asami watches them land with a thud and rubs her arms. Korra smiles, her feet dancing along the grass, finding their rhythm. "What'd I tell you?"

"I wasn't the one doubting you."

"Up for some hand-to-hand?"

Asami smiles, moving into defensive position. "All right. Show me what you've got."

Korra surges forward on a current of wind. Her kick once again only finds air. Asami isn't a bender but she's fast and she fights defensively. She moves like water, much of Korra's punches sidestepped, ducked. Asami finds an opening, the flat of her palm pressing to the small of Korra's back before pushing, pitching Korra forward quickly before the Avatar regains her footing and faces her again. "Looks like I'm the one who's impressed," Korra says.

"It's not too late to show me up."

Asami charges and Korra's ready, parrying her swings, blocking her kicks, jumping when she tries to knock her legs out from under her. It's like a dance and Korra is light, free, reveling in the moment, in her partner. Everything feels so easy. Korra doesn't remember the last time anything felt that way. Asami strikes but Korra anticipates it and sinks, darting up the split second Asami is turned and latching on to her, hand at her side, the other gripping Asami's outstretched arm, fingers wrapped around her wrist. Asami's tenses and looks back, their eyes meeting until Korra forgets what it is they were doing. Their faces are close, their breath uneven.

"I think we should talk about the kiss," Korra blurts out.

Asami's eyes widen. "_Now_?"

"Yes. Now." She doesn't know how long they stand, as if frozen in the middle of some waltz.

"All right," Asami sounds resigned, "why don't you go first?"

"I think we were really happy to see each other," Korra exclaims, as if the words had been pent inside of her, threatening to burst. "We'd been apart forever and it was a beautiful night and everything was…" _perfect_. As perfect as things can be these days. "I think we were just really happy," she says again. She returned to Air Temple Island on cloud nine.

Asami's gaze turns distant and then away from her. "Yeah," she says shakily, "me too."

For minutes they catch their breath, the first moment they've had since they began sparring. Their faces are flushed, bodies tight with tension. Korra's feverish. She hasn't slept in days. The kiss made every piece of her feel as if it were made of light. For a brief moment she presses her forehead to Asami's back. As bright as that moment felt, it isn't enough to stymy the fog that has ensnared her for years, the air that grows colder by the second. Storm clouds are rolling in. Korra's voice is small. Her heart beats at a hundred miles per hour. "I just don't think…"

"You don't have to explain." Asami dips, abandoning the jacket, leaving Korra to hold it as if she were in the midst of a magic trick.

"So that's it? The conversation is over?"

"We talked about it." Asami punches and kicks, her ferocity a little wild now and Korra is pushed back, momentarily lost until she outstretches the jacket, wraps it around Asami's foot and flips. Asami lands on the ground, rolls back into a crouched position, face stooped, breathing quickly, hair come loose.

Korra sees her opening and charges, stops. That _thing _with her face rises slowly, chain wrapped around her arm clinking, eyes aglow. Korra's frozen. What's it doing here…? The air goes out of her. The figure lurches forward and Korra retreats, screams. "Get away!" she throws fire at it, misses, leaps to the side before climbing to her feet and summoning an air kick.

Tenzin and Jinora shout. Their voices break through the fog. Korra blinks, sees them racing to her, to Asami who's on her knees, a hand to her stomach, her face pained. Korra goes white. She brings her hands to her hair. No. No. No. No. No. Crazy. She's crazy. She turns and runs.

* * *

><p>Dark waves crash against the docks of Aang Memorial Island. The bitterly cold water sprays her. Korra sits, thinking of the time Amon trapped her, taunted her about taking her bending. It once terrified her. Without her bending, she was no Avatar. She was no anything. On some of her darkest days she wished he'd succeeded. Maybe no one should have the kind of power she has. Not when it could be used to hurt the ones she cares about most.<p>

Hours have passed on the island and she doesn't think she can cry anymore. Ever since Zaheer poisoned her, she's been unable to really connect with Raava and she's felt incomplete for it. Lesser. She looks to the statue of Aang but he can't help. None of the Avatars will ever help her again. She wraps her arms around her legs and draws them close. How can she stop Kuvira when she can't tell ally from enemy? She'd hoped being in Republic City would be enough to stop seeing that foul spirit.

It isn't long before the rain starts, fat and heavy. Korra lets it fall over her until her skin is as numb as the rest of her. Standing, she dives into the water, the frigid temperature making her muscles contract and seize. Above, a motorboat roars past her, blades chopping in the water. Sputtering, she kicks to the surface, hair plastered to her face. The engine stalls, the boat rocking in the choppy waves. Asami. Her face is relieved, sad.

Korra's instinct is to kick herself to the bottom of the water, to remove herself from Asami's presence. Her vision waters again, salty as the water, hot when every other part of her is cold. Asami leans over the boat and stretches out her hand. Korra barely keeps afloat, letting the waves push her back and forth. In response, Asami stretches out further from the boat, her fingers grasping.

Not willing to risk having her fall in, Korra tentatively swims closer. Asami takes her hand, pulling her onboard.

* * *

><p>The Sato estate is quiet.<p>

Korra hasn't said a word since being found. _Tenzin, Jinora and I were so worried, _Asami told her on the drive back_. We split up. Then, Jinora said she felt your energy at Avatar Aang Memorial Island. I wish it were as easy for me to find you as it is for her. _

Asami returns to the bedroom with a small plate of food, a tea kettle and two steaming cups. The fireplace roars. A blanket sits around Korra's shoulders. Warmth slowly settles back into her skin. Asami nudges the food to her but Korra has no appetite. She listens to Asami move around the room, the radio coming on and soft velveteen music coming out.

Asami sits beside her, as if she shouldn't have any reason to fear her. Her raven hair is still wet, waves beginning to form in it. With no make-up, she looks younger. Asami's so mature, Korra sometimes forgets she's only a year older than her. Korra shivers and Asami picks up one of the teacups and puts it tenderly in her hand. "Drink this. You need to warm up."

"I shouldn't be here." Her voice is flat. It's an effort to speak and she's surprised she can do it at all.

"Drink," Asami urges quietly.

Korra chucks the teacup into the fire. It splinters, the fire flaring. Asami doesn't recoil from her but she stills, as if hoping not to be noticed. Korra gets to her feet and throws the blanket off. "I have no right being here. I don't know what I was thinking, coming here with you. I'm going back to Air Temple Island. Maybe I'll go back to the swamp," she hisses. Asami looks at her worriedly. "I was such an idiot! I thought I could come back here and be the same old Avatar I was but I was wrong! Obviously, I'm still all messed up! I haven't gotten better! And here you are taking care of me again! It's pathetic! _I'm_ pathetic!"

Asami carefully rises to her feet. "Korra." Her voice is soft. She doesn't make any attempt to come closer and Korra isn't sure if she doesn't want to set her off or if she's just afraid of her. "It's all right."

"No, it's not all right! I hurt you!"

Asami shakes her head. "I was… distracted."

"Stop making excuses for me!" She's never shouted at Asami before but she can't make herself stop.

There's a knock at the door. They tense. Asami slides the door open, whispers, nods before closing it again. Korra bites her tongue. Was it the others? Are they worried about Asami? Are they worried about _her? _Worried she'll do something or not do something? Asami comes closer, hands carefully taking holds of her face, thumbs easing along her cheeks, wiping away the tears Korra hadn't known she'd been crying. "You can be angry and you can smash all the tea cups you want, Korra, but I'm not going to be scared and I'm not going to give up on you."

How can Asami not be scared when she's terrified? "I don't know what's wrong with me," she takes Asami's wrists, looking for anything to hold on to, her voice pitches and falls. "I don't know how to fight this. I feel like I'm going crazy. Tenzin must be so disappointed. I think Zaheer broke some part of me that day," it's the first time she's vocalized the thought that has woven in and out of her mind, the one she's tried not to pay any attention to, the one she's wanted to leave in the shadows. "I can't get to the spirit world. I don't feel… whole. I hoped when I got back… we could… I wanted…" she shakes her head, bows it.

Asami wraps her arms around her. Korra closes her eyes and rests against her. "I know. It's all right."

* * *

><p>They fall asleep on the floor, listening to music, fingertips brushing.<p>

Hours later, Asami's fingers jerk and Korra wakes, yawns, not readily remembering how she got here. A singer croons a love song on the radio. Asami's lips move soundlessly, her brow furrowed. Korra kneels beside her, fearing what she may be dreaming of, before scooping her up and carrying her to the bed. She tries to shut down those things she's thought about, off and on, the years she was gone, and carefully pulls the blankets over her. Asami rouses, smiles tiredly when she sees her. Korra smiles back. "Hey."

"Hey…" Asami's voice is wispy, she looks blearily up at her, to the bed and back to Korra before she frowns lightly and hugs her pillow. "I was having a bad dream, I think."

Korra rubs Asami's arm gently. "It's over now. Just get some rest. I'll wait here with you."

"You can sleep on the bed," she yawns delicately, snuggling deeper into the pillow, "I doubt you'll be kissing me again." Korra tenses. Is that how it happened? She wants to ask but it seems unfair to press. She tries not to think of that kiss. She's tried everything in her power to not think of it and always fails.

"If I lie down next to you, I won't get any sleep." She grumbles. Asami closes her eyes, smiling faintly. Not long after, she's back asleep. Korra moves around the room, picking up the blanket she'd previously thrown and folding it. She finds the broken tea cup and digs it out of the fireplace. Asami being Asami, has glue in the room and Korra haphazardly pieces it back together. It's chipped in the corner and try as Korra might, she can't find the missing piece. She writes 'sorry' on a notecard with a sad face beneath it.

She's looking for a paper and pen, moving through Asami's desk drawers when she finds her two letters, the envelopes soft from wear, her letters inside, just as worn. Korra holds on to them, bites her tongue and carefully returns them. She finds a piece of paper and a pen. Grabbing one of Asami's engineering books, she takes it with her to sit beside the bed on the floor.

_Dear Asami,_

_I feel awful about how things have gone down since I came back from the Earth Kingdom. It seems like no matter what, all I do is hurt the people I care about. I haven't really known how to explain my absence to anybody, and in a way, I haven't felt the need to, but I want to with you. _

_The longer I was away, the harder it seemed to come back. Everyone was moving on with their lives and in my absence, Kuvira took over the Earth Kingdom. I felt guiltier and more worthless by the day. There were some days, it was hard for me just to get out of bed. Eventually, I think I felt like it would be best to never come back. I've been having visions—of myself— in the Avatar state when Zaheer had me. Or hallucinations, I don't know. The vision keeps following me and she always seems to show up at the worst possible time. That's what happened today. I saw her and I freaked out. No matter what you say, I can't and I won't ask you to forgive me for that. _

_I think Toph might be right and there's something that's seriously holding me back._

_I'm not great with words so I can't really think of how to explain it. What happened today—hurting you—that's something I'm going to carry with me for the rest of my life. I think I know what I have to do now. I'm terrified and I don't want to—but I can't think of any other way of moving forward, with my life—or with yours. _

_In those last six months I was gone, I traveled the world hoping to reconnect with Raava. The spirits couldn't help me and I figured I had to go at it on my own. I didn't know what I was in for. Traveling the world on my own was nothing like being with Team Avatar. There were some days I thought I would die, some days when I thought it wouldn't be so bad. In spite of that, I think the hardest thing for me was not getting your letters, not knowing what was going on, or if maybe you'd just moved on. I brought the letters you wrote with me. I think that's how I got through. I think that's how I knew I needed to get back._

_I'm going to see Zaheer. I hope I won't be gone long. I just know that things can't continue like this._

- _Korra_

She folds the letter and sets it on Asami's nightstand. The sun is rising. It's time to go.

* * *

><p>AN: Hrm. A little bit of a debbie downer chapter but my thought is that Korra still has issues that don't magically go away because of happy reunions. And what is fighting choreography? Sorry. Next chapter might take a little longer to post. This one and the next took longer than the previous ones combined. Hmph. Letters are easier.


	6. Chapter 6

Korra has been gone for days.

The vines rustle, snaking along the city streets, squeezing buildings until they shake.

President Raiko has tasked Asami and Varrick with finding a way to stop Kuvira's super-weapon. She gathered from Bolin's blabbering that the weapon has the capability to destroy cities with a solitary blast. Not good. Future Industries helped to literally create a rail bridge between the Earth Kingdom and Republic City. To think that that same bridge could now be used to level Republic City… It's a lot to think about.

She has to focus and is finding it impossible. Jinora and other airbenders have been trapped by those vines. Tenzin revealed that Jinora found Korra before she could make it to Zaheer but it all led to the same end and President Raiko has granted her access. Now it's a matter of getting over there. Mako has agreed to go with Korra but Asami is uneasy. What if Zaheer gets free? What if he—

Varrick slaps a ruler hard onto her drawing. "Hey Asami, chop, chop! I know I'm the greater genius but I've got enough weight to carry around without having to lug your freakishly tall weight, too. Get to work! Let's show President Raiko what the two most devastatingly beautiful CEOs of Future Industries can do!"

"You're not—" she snaps before picking up the drawing pad. "I'm going to get some air. Try not to steal everything while I'm gone," she ignores his indignant tirade and heads outside. For years she lived at Future Industries and now she can't bear to be in the building another moment. No doubt Varrick being there has some effect on that. She finds a bench beneath a tree and sits. The oversized drawing pad sits on her lap and all she can do is stare at it.

The city streets are remarkably quiet. A temporary evacuation has been ordered until the situation with the vines calms down. Asami has no doubt that Korra will resolve the situation, yet, her stomach is in knots. Korra pieced together a broken teacup, its edges jagged, glue holding it together, then wrote her a letter and told her she was going to see the man who terrified them beyond comprehension.

Korra had spoken of the difficulty of the years before. It seemed natural to Asami that things would be difficult. Without being able to walk, needing someone else to meet every need—what was hard to understand about that? But there's more. Something that has been festering beneath the surface. What Asami thought she knew is only the tip of the iceberg. The fear in Korra's eyes during their sparring match—Asami momentarily wondered if Zaheer had gotten free, was behind her. She tried to go to her, just barely missed a shot of fire to the face, and wasn't able to escape the ferocious air kick. It hurt, but not so much as seeing that look on Korra's face after the fact. What had that been other than despair? What nightmares have haunted her day to day?

"Focus," she mutters.

She presses her pencil to the paper. Korra hasn't been back in Republic City long. The situation with Kuvira is heating up. Asami tries to make herself into steel. Now, more than ever, she needs to get her head in the game. Kuvira poses a risk to more than the Earth Kingdom. She threatens all nations. If they're going to stop her, she needs to do her part. She wonders if Korra will have to fight her again. The thought makes her uneasy.

Why hasn't Korra returned?

_You need to trust her. Whatever she's going to do, she'll do it. She can do anything._

How can she believe the words and still be so nervous? A leaf flutters by, small and green, brushing over her lips, careful as the start of Korra's kiss. The leaf settles on the corner of the drawing pad and Asami finds herself thinking of that night in the park and the way she thought her heart would burst. _I think we were really happy to see each other. _

Asami massages her temple. She agreed because she had no choice but to agree. No matter her feelings, Korra isn't ready for a relationship right now. She clears her throat gently, as the revelation dawns on her. She wanted that kiss, has wanted it for longer than she knows. She is unsure of when she fell in love but knows it undoubtedly to be true. It all makes sense now. Why did it take her so long to realize it? Because they were best friends?

Not that it matters. What Korra needs right now is friendship, stability, support, someone to confide in. Asami will give her whatever she needs. She'll do it without asking for anything in return. She'll do it, because she's incapable of doing anything else, giving her anything less.

_I hoped when I got back… we could… I wanted…_

**_Let it go. _**It doesn't matter what Korra hoped, what she hoped. Things are what they are. Korra needs to recover. Asami's just be happy she came back, even if she is gone again. Once more, she wonders when she'll return. There's a small flash of color, wild blues and greens distracting her from her thoughts. She blinks. A humming bird dragonfly lands at the center of the paper, its wings fluttering

* * *

><p>A breeze moves through the building, entering through the massive hole left by the vine that receded at some point in the night. A fat moon hangs in the sky. Now and then Asami will look at it and remember all those days she and Korra were apart. She supposes she's gotten a little sentimental.<p>

The good news is that these moments are fleeting. Inspired by the hummingbird dragonfly, she has hit the ground running and drafted several designs of a flying mech suit. Lighter, quieter and fast, they might be enough to sneak past Kuvira's army and dismantle whatever weapon she has, without any lives lost. That's the idea, anyway. She scribbles a few mathematical notations off to the side and glances up when she sees a shadow fall over the page.

Korra crouches in the wall opening, her eyes brighter than Asami has seen since her return. She gets to her feet too quickly but her voice is restrained. "You're back."

Varrick jumps to his feet, from where he'd been sleeping on the couch, head back, snoring, and focuses his attention on Korra. "Avatar Korra! How kind of you to drop in on our little operation but I'm afraid you can't stay." He wraps a tight arm around Asami's shoulder, yanking her close. "You wouldn't believe how hard I've had to fight to get this one to do anything! Exhausting work, I think I've been passed out, what, nine, twelve hours?" Asami opens her mouth but he continues. "It's impossible to get her focused and I'm afraid your presence really doesn't help—"

"_Your_ presence really doesn't help!" Korra retorts. She removes his arm from Asami's shoulder and grabs her wrist, fingers grazing along her palm as Korra pulls her from the work room and into the hallway. Their steps clank on the metal floor. The building is shut down for the most part. Lights hang on the ceiling, shining down solitary columns of light. "Agh, I thought we'd be alone. Why's he here?"

"Long story."

"Kuvira?"

"Not that long, I guess."

Korra grins. "Bolin told me about what's happening in the Earth Kingdom. I guess it makes sense to gather our two resident geniuses and start them on a project." She paces along the small corridor and Asami moves past the doorway, when she notices Varrick's neck craned to watch them. "So," she finally stops moving, places her palms on the railing, "I'm back."

"You're back." She says cautiously. Trepidation creeps onto Korra's features. "I know you were doing what you felt you had to but it doesn't mean I have to like it. I was worried. And I didn't like waking up to a letter. I was afraid you were gone-gone again."

The tension leaves Korra's face. "I guess I didn't think of that. I just thought you'd like to have another letter." Asami tries to keep her face blank. "I didn't want to wake you. I wouldn't really leave without saying goodbye."

The words make it a little easier to breathe. "So… did you see him?"

"I did."

Korra tells her about Jinora and the spirit vines, about her inability to set them free because of her lost connection with the spirit world. She tells her how her heart nearly leapt out of her chest when Zaheer lunged at her, but in the same vein, how he told her their aims were now the same, how they were united in a cause and how he led her into the spirit world.

"I know it sounds nuts. Here's the guy who broke me. Poisoned me." She pulls her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. "He walked me through those things he did. I thought I wouldn't be able to see it. I didn't want to. But I did. I _survived _that." She shakes her head. "I walked in there pretty pissed off. Raiko was having a meeting about the Earth Kingdom with Wu. _Wu. _And I wasn't invited! And then Tenzin said they all thought I'd been called back to action too soon. After three years!" Asami is silent and eventually Korra continues. "He was afraid to let me see Zaheer, even when Jinora's safety was at stake. I don't know, it just felt like everyone had lost faith in me. The whole reason I couldn't save Jinora and the others before was because I couldn't get to the spirit world. No one thought I could do anything—but Zaheer, he tells me my power is limitless, that the poison would have killed anyone else, that _I _was the one holding myself back." She closes her eyes, takes a breath, smiles. "I know that's a lot."

"It must be exciting to reach the spirit world again." It seems like just about everyone has gone there. She can't imagine what wonders it holds. It'd be nice to go someday. Maybe if she was a bender she would have had an opportunity before but she isn't and with Korra here she can't think of any reason to go to the Southern Water Tribe.

"It is," Korra looks at her. "I can't tell you how much better I feel. I feel… like a whole person again. For so long, I felt like I was… walking blind and just hoping I'd land, hoping I wouldn't trip and fall on my face. After everything Zaheer did… All the other Red Lotus are dead. I don't know. Sometimes I had really dark thoughts about him."

"Me too," Asami says quietly.

Korra shifts to face her. "But now… all of those thoughts seem so foolish to me. If Zaheer was really gone, he couldn't have helped me. Maybe I would have been blocked off from the spirit world forever. There's still so much to do. I'll never be able to let go of what's happened. And I can't pretend that I'm all better now but it feels like a new beginning. I think I can start to move forward. Even if Toph's right and everything's always going to be screwed up no matter what I do, it's my job to restore balance, even if it's hard, even if I suffer. I'm the Avatar. No one else can do it."

Their eyes meet and Asami smiles before bowing her head. "I'm just happy to hear you talking like this again."

"There was a big celebration at Air Temple Island— for the vines and the people released from the Spirit World," she dismisses. "I came over as soon as I could. I just—I really wanted to tell you. And… I didn't want you to be worried."

The 'worried' lifts at the end, making it into a question. "I appreciate it. You drive me crazy sometimes." She sighs softly, thinking of Korra's letter, thinking, in some ways, that it really is unfair that of all the people who could help Korra, it was the very man who'd so brutally beaten her. But, she reminds herself, that's just a selfish way of thinking. It doesn't matter who helped Korra, only that someone was able to. Korra looks at her anxiously and Asami considers the quiet revelations in Korra's letter but can't bring herself to ask about any of them. "Anyway… I'd better get back to it," she says getting to her feet.

Korra jumps up, just as quickly, her expression flummoxed. "What? Seriously? I came by to see you. It's pretty late. Why don't we get out of here?"

_And do what? _She can't ask. If she asks, Korra will answer, or will give a non-answer, some charming thing that Asami can't afford to let herself be distracted by. "I'm on a deadline. This is pretty important."

"You think I don't know how important it is?" Before Asami can respond, Korra shakes her head. "Sorry. Whole or not, everyone's out there trying to find a way to take down Kuvira. Suyin and her family are trapped because I failed to stop her. And now, Opal, Lin and Bolin have gone on some super secret mission to get them out of there. I should be out there doing something."

"You just came back from 'doing something'. With what Kuvira's got planned? It won't be long until we're all back in the thick of it." Korra takes a step closer and Asami takes one back. "Just get some rest," she steps around her, Korra's eyes following her every move. "You'll be saving all of us soon enough. And for the record," she walks backwards, facing her, "I always thought you could do anything."

"Asami…"

"Work." She goes into the office before she forgets herself.

* * *

><p>Korra takes a running leap off the bridge, riding a wind current before landing hard in the front seat of Asami's car. Asami's eyes go wide and Korra takes hold of the steering wheel before the car runs off the road and into a news vendor. The wheels screech as the car rights itself.<p>

"What are you doing?" Asami demands, looking furiously from the road to Korra. "You scared me half to death!"

Korra smiles apologetically. "I – uh—wanted to surprise you?" Mission accomplished. Asami's fingers grip the wheel more tightly and Korra notices she's knocked over a Pai Sho board when she dropped into the seat, the pieces scattered all over the floor. She reaches down awkwardly and tries to pick them up. "Okay, maybe it was dumb, but I've been trying to catch you for days and you're always busy. Varrick said you took off. I thought you could take me for a spin again. That's always fun."

Asami glances quickly from the road to Korra and back to the road. Her leather gloves glisten in the sunlight, as they tighten once again on the steering wheel. "I'm going to pull over so you can get out."

Korra frowns. "What? Why? No. Come on," she sighs. _Looks like you screwed this up, too_. "Maybe you're running errands! I'll pick up whatever you want. I'll be the muscle! Don't pull over," she almost whines the words.

Asami doesn't pull over, though her eyes are narrowed and she looks more intense than Korra ever recalls seeing her. The trees on the side of the road whip by. Asami has a heavy foot. Ever since their sparring session something hasn't been right. "Are you still mad at me?" Korra asks. Asami's brow only creases. "About… I wish I could express how sorry I am about attacking you. I understand if you want me to take off."

Asami blinks. "That's over with. I'm not mad about it." And for a moment it's the same old Asami, the one who looks at her with puzzlement, who always has a reassuring smile.

"I am," Korra grumbles. "Is it about Zaheer?" The words are barely out of her mouth when Asami takes a sharp right turn, cutting a line of cars off and pulling into an alley. Korra cringes. Steam puffs out of various pipes. Lines of laundry are strung up above them like a cat's cradle. A cold drop of water hits Korra's shoulder. "I'll get out."

"Don't. I just can't drive and listen to you."

"Ouch."

"You know what I mean."

"It's never been a problem before." That was, however, before they kissed, before Korra attacked her, before Korra excused the kiss as fuzzies over a happy reunion. A dog yaps in the distance and Korra suddenly notices how shadowy the alley is. She tells herself not to think of the Earth Kingdom, the dark Avatar version of herself that hounded her into an alley. She can't go there. Not now. She focuses on Asami. "I just haven't seen you in a few days and I really miss you."

Asami still has her hands on the steering wheel. The gloves creak softly as she unclenches them and settles her hands in her lap instead. "I've been really busy with this mech project." She stares straight ahead. Something is different between them. Korra isn't sure how to feel about it. _You do know how you feel about it. It sucks. _"But you're right, we haven't seen each other as much as I'd like." She looks at her furtively. "I've been eating, living, breathing, sleeping Varrick." Korra blanches. Asami hangs her head. "I'd rather it be you." And just as quickly Asami's looked away. "He's so exhausting. I can't wait for this project to be over."

Project? Oh. Yes. Thank the spirits. That makes much more sense. She tries to scrub all other images of Asami and Varrick from her mind. "Okay. I just feel like things have really changed between us. And I can't pinpoint it exactly. I mean—I know the big thing," she says more quietly. "Maybe this was a mistake."

"What was?"

Asami's face is nearly as pained as when Korra struck her. Korra can't swallow the lump in her throat. "Um—this, I mean," she exhales, "hopping into your car without an invitation. Ugh, I've been wanting to speak to you but I just haven't found the right time." She runs a hand through her hair. "You're so busy and everyone's _freaking out _about Kuvira. I just wish there was more time for us."

Asami blinks, clears her throat and starts the engine. "That does sound nice. I miss my best friend," she says.

Her best friend. She can't be mad or disappointed. She's the one who slammed the breaks on anything that might have been happening between them. How could she have anticipated that speaking to Zaheer would clear up so much of what'd been holding her back? That's assuming Asami wanted anything to begin with. Korra kissed her, not the other way around and Asami had been quick to agree that they'd only gotten carried away by their reunion. Still, she wishes it felt better. She could have sworn that maybe Asami felt the same way, that her letters were more than just words to her best friend—or not only that—that maybe they were love letters. "So, where we headed?" Korra asks.

Asami drives the car out of the alley, zipping through a stream of traffic before getting into the proper lane. She could be a movers' stuntwoman. "To see my father." Asami says. Korra curls her fingers tight until the little nails she has dig into her hand. "Visiting hours are limited and I've been pretty busy. Anytime something big happens, lives are lost. I just want to talk to him, you know, in case something happens to me."

"I won't let anything happen to you," she says fiercely, "no matter what."

Asami looks at her. "The things you say…" She tries to hide her smile. "Are you sure you don't want me to pull over?"

"No way. You want to see your dad, we'll go see your dad."

"I don't know…" she says thoughtfully. "What happened with Amon and the Equalists was really scary. I know how terrified you were of him."

She still remembers Amon's bloodbending, Tarrlok's, how Amon pressed his thumb to her forehead and suddenly she wasn't her anymore. "It wasn't easy for a lot of us." Korra frowns. "And I can't say I approve of what your father did but losing what matters makes you crazy sometimes. There were times when I was in the Southern Water Tribe that I could feel that poison from everything I'd lost festering inside of me. It wasn't anything I could bend out."

"I wish I could have been there with you."

Her heart does flips. "Me too." Even if she'd been the idiot to silently refuse Asami's offer to be there.

They exchange looks, smiles and Asami turns back to the road. "Actually, it's funny you're here. You were gone for so long. Everyone thought I handled it really well but I didn't. I threw myself into work, just do deal with it. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have a company to run." She looks at her. "I understand why you were gone, Korra. I do. But it was still really hard not to hear from you. I can't change how I feel."

"I wouldn't ask you to."

"I started thinking you would never come back. Mako was busy, Bolin was gone and honestly, without you I never really felt like I belonged with Tenzin and the others. I thought I'd lost you and Dad was writing me all these letters. I couldn't think of any good that anger was doing me. It w_as _like poison. I started thinking 'what if something happens to me and all he has left of me is my hatred'? I didn't want that. Some part of me was also afraid to be alone. I mean, really alone. He's the only family I have left." She shakes her head. "I guess my point is, that not having you here reminded me of what was really important, that we have to seize things while we can, while we have them."

It takes everything Korra has to not kiss her then and there. "Yeah, I know what you mean."

* * *

><p>The car is parked on a bluff overlooking the city. Waves crash below them. Republic City glitters like gold, the stars above them like diamonds. They lie on the hood of the car, staring up. Their hands linger close but don't touch. The night breeze pulls at their clothes.<p>

The ride back from the prison passed in relative silence, their ease growing the further they went. The prison itself was small, grey and drab. Hiroshi is older, smaller, frailer than Korra remembered. Asami's back was straight as a rod, her face upon entering the room ice, but softening, Korra noticed, as the visit progressed. Hiroshi stopped short, spotting Korra. He'd looked from her, to Asami. Some part of him, Korra thinks, wondered if he'd been betrayed. _Avatar Korra. _He nodded and barely met her eyes. Asami squeezed Korra's wrist before sitting opposite of him in a flimsy chair.

Korra hung back, watching the sun set past the barred windows, listening to Asami's voice, quiet and controlled and Hiroshi's apologetic murmurs. Asami withdrew the Pai Sho board and together, father and daughter set the pieces together for the game. The moment felt so intensely personal that Korra caught Asami's eyes, silently asking whether she should go. Asami shook her head. A guard brought Korra a chair and she sat next to Asami. Hiroshi watched them, his smile small and nostalgic.

"Thanks for coming with me to see my dad," Asami says. They stepped outside after the visit, Asami resting her hands on her knees before standing straight and taking a deep breath. _Are you okay? _Korra asked. _Yes. Come on._ "It was good having you for the drive back. I'm usually a mess after those visits."

It isn't hard to imagine Asami bearing the situation on her own. If Korra hadn't returned, would Asami have told anyone? Or would she have suffered in silence? "Then I'm glad I was there. I know… how private that must be. I was wrong to intrude."

"Maybe he needed to see you, too. After everything he did." Asami crosses her arms and Korra wonders if she's cold or only trying to keep the memories from getting too close. _I know I caused you and my daughter a great deal of pain, _Hiroshi bowed lowly, prior to their exit, _I am very sorry. _Korra stood awkwardly, exchanging a glance with Asami whose face was tight. "It couldn't have been easy for you to see him. He tried to kill you."

_He tried to kill you, too. _Korra hadn't been there for that and doesn't feel she has any room to talk about it. Asami's trying to move on from that time. Bolin told her about it. _Aww, man, what a crummy dad, right? I feel _**_horrible_**_. I got Pabu to do a few juggling tricks, with his cute little mustache and nothing! She locked herself up and cried. True fact. I had a glass cup to the door. My heart, her heart, _he made a shape with his hands before snapping it in half_._ He spent the next half hour hugging Pabu, telling him he'd never hurt him. "He pretty much destroyed me at Pai Sho," Korra says. "Once Bolin comes back I'll have to go sit in a corner and sulk with him. That was rough."Asami smiles faintly. "He was so happy to see you. What he did with the Equalists… it wasn't right," she shrugs, "but people are more than just one thing. The way he seemed with you today… I don't think you can ever fake love like that."

"I still haven't forgiven him," Asami defends but it almost seems like she's fighting against herself. "He wasn't expecting you."

"Yeah, I don't blame him. It wouldn't have been my choice on where to go on a Saturday night."

"So why did you?"

"Are you kidding? It was important to you."

"You're important to me." Asami tells the stars. "I'm really glad you can go into the spirit world again. Do you think you'll ever forgive Zaheer for everything he did?"

The question is unexpected. Despite how Zaheer has changed her life, changed _her, _she'd never progressed enough in her thinking to consider it. He's been an ominous presence, a nightmare, crippling her emotionally, physically, spiritually. "I don't know," she says honestly. "It wasn't only me he hurt."

"And if it was?"

"I still don't know," she says helplessly. She folds her arms behind her head. "Sometimes I think that he stole my life. From me, my family, my friends. And other times I wonder if I've just been weak. That maybe I just didn't push myself enough. Even if I'm whole again—I don't know that I'll ever be who I was. People always say that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger but maybe that's not always true."

"I think it is." Asami looks at her. "After everything you went through, you came back. You went to see him. You're stronger than you'll ever know." She crosses one leg gently over the other, mirroring Korra, arms folded behind her head, eyes once again turned to the skies. "I've given it a lot of thought. I've thought about it every day since we came back from that place. Every hour since you went away from Republic City. I hate Zaheer. I hate what he did to you, to everyone else, to us. I'll never forgive him." She looks at Korra. "Not ever."

Her heartbeat is sharp and heavy. It's odd. Even if she's still unsure of how to feel about it, she wants Asami to forgive him. She doesn't want her to carry that poison. Especially if it's poison that's carried for her. "Maybe in time…"

"No."

There's a flash of anger in her voice, a hint of vulnerability. Korra doesn't push it. They listen to the waves crashing against the cliff.

* * *

><p>Asami's office is dark but the moonlight and stars flow a river of light through the room. Asami sets the car keys down on the desk. Korra is close. Korra who opted not to return to Air Temple Island and walk her to her office instead. "I never gave you the tour, did I?"<p>

"So this is where you hid while I was away." Korra looks around the office, spotting the plush leather chair behind the desk. Plaques awarded by President Raiko and various engineering groups line the walls. "Ever bring any hot dates here?"

Asami laughs. "Just you." She reclines against the edge of the desk. "I'd be here till all hours of the night. Whenever I got stuck I'd grab a pen and paper and write." She looks at her. "'Dear Korra, I miss you...' I wrote to you, even when I didn't put it to paper. I had to show some restraint." She smiles, crossing her arms. "Sometimes I'd make it home to bed but that was rare. More often than not, I was here. This was home."

"And now that I'm back?"

"Home feels different. It's more than just a building and a bed, you know?" Korra nods, pushing aside the stacks of files on the desk and sitting. "What did you write your parents when you were gone? They mentioned you'd written, saying you were here."

Korra flushes. "Yeah. I did. I didn't want them to worry. So I just lied." She grimaces. "I never really lied before but letters make everything easier. Some letters." A beat. "I never lied to you. I didn't want to start. I told my parents how happy I was to be back in Republic City. How happy I was to be with everyone again."

"How does it stack up to what you imagined?"

"Everything feels the same... but different. It's exciting and scary. The last six months before I returned to Republic City were so lonely. I kept trying to find myself but all I ever really saw was that dark Avatar, reminding me of what I lost, when I lost it. Reminding me of my failure. I entered cage matches. Real basic stuff and I still lost. I felt so low," Korra bows her chin, feels Asami's hand melding to the shape of her face, warm and holding her steady. She flicks her eyes to her. "Every time I felt overwhelmed, I'd read your letters. I thought, if you could write me, did write me, as long as you did, I wasn't a lost cause. I always felt less lonely after reading them, as if some part of you was still with me." Her eyes soften. "I'm so sorry I didn't write. Your letters saved me," she whispers, "and I gave you nothing for them."

"I didn't write them so you could give me anything. I wrote them because I…" Asami swallows the words, frowns, settles her hands on the edge of the desk and tilts her head back, eyes closed.

Korra imagines pressing a kiss to her neck, imagines Asami shifting to find her mouth instead. Despite the chill in the room, Korra's skin goes hot thinking of it. "I shouldn't have said what I did. About the kiss. About being happy to see you. I mean, I _was _happy to see you. But I think some part of me was afraid you'd see how screwed up I still was and you wouldn't want anything to do with me. And after what I did..." Asami takes her hand. "I thought you deserved someone who wasn't all messed up in the head. Someone more like the old Avatar. But I'm feeling better now and I think we have something special," she slides off the desk and stands in front of her. "I'm _better _when I'm with you. No one has ever made me feel like this and maybe that's something everyone says but I'm not exactly smooth and I think it'd be stupid not to try. I _want _this. It took me too long to realize but I know now and I don't want to waste another second. I think you want the same thing. You can't deny there's something between us. Something amazing."

The last thing she expects is the hesitation in Asami's eyes. "Korra, I—I don't know."

The words knock the air from Korra, a hot, bristly feeling spreading like the impact of an unexpected hit. She frowns as the words send spidercracks along her confidence. "You _do_ know." She steps closer, palms to either side of her on the desk, lifting her face to brush her lips along Asami's neck, satisfied with the uneven breath she draws out of her, the way her face dips as if seeking something more. "I know you know." Korra brings a hand to Asami's neck, her thumb tugging gently at her lower lip, thumb coming away with cherry lipstick, her own breath growing unsteady as Asami swiftly switches their positions, looks at her, flushed, the heat of her skin radiating, spilling over Korra. She is another element altogether. Surprising, uncontrollable, fascinating.

Her hand finds the small of Korra's back and pulls Korra against her. Heat spreads through the Avatar as their bodies press together. Asami glides her lips over Korra's, brings her lips to her ears. "Yes. I know." Their eyes meet and that sends another flush of lava through Korra. Asami burns more than fire. Her mouth settles over Korra's, soft, blanketing. Their lips part, tongues touch, a gasp and soft moan from them, and sounds, colors, breath, contact, melt together, reducing her to sensation, light, her system overloaded. She has been starved for this.

* * *

><p>AN: Wow, this was a lengthy chapter. Congratulations, whoever finished it. For whatever reason, this chapter and the last have been really hard to write, so I apologize if they're a little boring. The heavy dialogue (as in, a lot of it) is kind of vexing. At the same time, they had so little time to talk in the show in the last season that I keep loading it up.

Thanks to jtav for the feedback! Without jtav, there would not have been this final section (or blame jtav if you hate it). I also acknowledge that trying to stick to canon has messed up the flow so for now I'm going to say 'eff it' and try not to be so much of a stickler for it. Or at least attempt to keep it authentic to the show. Apologies if it's been a little bit of a bumpy read. I'm also trying to stick to a Teen rating which I'm notoriously awful with. Desks and bathtubs are too much fun.

Finally, many thanks for those who have left such kind reviews.I think I've been pushing myself a little harder to deliver something of a higher quality because of them. Next chapter should be the end of this story!


	7. Chapter 7

The hummingbird mecha suits are taking longer than anticipated. Asami, Varrick and most of the workers don't leave the factory, working in shifts to increase productivity. The air is full of static and heat. A sheen of sweat sticks to everyone. Sleep becomes a thing of the past. It isn't until she's weaving in place, eyes half shut as she welds, that Varrick slaps a hand on her back and tells her to catch some shut eye.

Asami removes the welding mask and collapses on the couch, falling asleep instantly. She hasn't been asleep more than a few minutes when a touch grazes along her face. She knows that hand, soft, fingertips callused. She smiles at the dream, burrowing into the contact when someone clears their throat. Her eyes snap open. Korra sits on the couch beside her, smiling, cheeks red. Bolin and Mako stand behind Korra, exchanging looks. Asami snaps to a sitting. "Um—what's going on?" How long have they been there?

"We have some news," Korra says apologetically. "Bolin, do you want—"

"Let me. We don't have any time to spare," Mako looks at Asami. "Kuvira and her super weapon are headed here. We have about two weeks time. The evacuation has become mandatory. We need to get everyone out of the city in a hurry. How are those suits coming along?"

Asami rubs her eyes, guilt washing over her. They have caught her, literally asleep on the job. "Everyone's been working around the clock. We're nearly there but they're not ready for the field yet. Are you sure about Kuvira?"

Bolin nods grimly. "Zhu Li can confirm everything. The good news is that we'll know where to expect them. It's huge so they have to transport it through the rails."

"Iroh's army will be waiting," Korra gets to her feet, holding her hand out. Asami grabs it, and is gently tugged to a standing. Mako notices the gesture but says nothing. "If it's as bad as Bolin—I don't know, I have a bad feeling."

"It's one thing to be ready," Mako goes to the railing to look down at the hummingbird suits, "but if it gets here before we can stop it—stop her…"

"Okay," Bolin takes a breath, puts his hands out, "I know that I have a bit of a reputation for dramatics and making a big deal out of nothing. Ugh, remember how I broke down sobbing when I caught Mako kissing Korra?" Asami, Mako and Korra shuffle in place, none of them looking at one another, "but this is different! This is real bad news. A blast of that thing can blow up buildings. It'll wreck Republic City."

"Then we don't let it get here," Asami says. "That seems like the safest bet, doesn't it? There has to be some way to disable it. Let's take a small team. We get in, we get out. If it's as bad as you say, Bolin, we can't risk it getting here."

"Asami's right," Korra looks to the group. "Tenzin won't like it but we have to do this. It's the biggest guarantee we have of saving lives." She looks at Bolin and Mako. "Mako, I know you have Wu to guard and Bolin—we haven't been together in so long—but we need you guys."

Mako smiles and Asami sees the man she loved years ago, handsome, idealistic, brave. "Where ever you go, Korra, I have your back." He sticks a hand out. Bolin slaps his on top. Korra follows and Asami carefully slides her hand on top of hers. "Let's do it."

Korra nods firmly. "We'll stop this thing."

* * *

><p>The sky bison veers dangerously in the air, the heat of the spirit cannon making the air crackle around them. Asami falls back, grabs a tuft of bison fur, slips and freefalls into the sky. Her heart stops. Korra flips the bison, there's a gust of wind lifting her and then Bolin's hand wraps securely around her forearm, yanking her back onto the sky bison.<p>

Asami clings to Bolin's jacket briefly, trying to swallow her shock. "Thank you." Bolin gives her a stern nod, that of a military man.

The giant mecha takes a step, sound waves rippling through the skies. It's arm whirs and lifts.

"Everyone get ready!" Mako screams, "That thing's getting ready to fire again!"

"Oh man, oh man, oh man, oh man!" Bolin takes fierce hold of the saddle, hunkering down beside Asami. The air currents change, spark and static crackling again and then the VHOOOM as the shot fires.

"Hold on!" Korra shouts.

The air bison plummets and lifts, taking sharp turns in the sky as the spirit weapon rips through the skies. The air smells as if it's been fried, their eardrums near burst. "Find us some cover!" Asami directs, not that she knows what good it will do. There's a burning hole in the middle of the mountain that got the brunt of the blast, gaping and red.

Korra steers the air bison lower to the ground, out of sight from the mecha. Asami can't recall the last time her heart pounded so hard. "They're a week early!" Mako looks back fearfully. "We don't have anything in Republic City that can stand up to something like that!"

They've experienced some hearing loss, Asami thinks, and she hopes it's temporary. Mako is clearly shouting but his voice sounds muffled and quiet to her. "There must be some way to disable it. We can't give up yet," Asami returns. She repeats the statement, louder, when they all turn to her. "How could they have built a mecha like that? It's genius! Incredible!"

"Can you maybe appreciate the craftsmanship not right after that thing's nearly killed us?" Korra looks back at the group worriedly and skeptically at Asami. "We have to hope the evacuation's made some real headway. Ugh, it's going to take us almost a week to make it back to Republic City to warn everybody. We'll only have hours before Kuvira gets there!"

"Some warning is better than nothing," Mako says.

"That mecha is really, really big," Bolin stands to look back at it. "Jeez, I can see it from here." He slumps. "Can I at least steer the air bison back? This might be my last chance and I could use some cheering up."

"You can steer later," Korra tugs gently on the reins. "It's getting late and we should camp for the night."

The air bison begins its slow descent. Asami reclines against the walls of the saddle. How in the world are they going to stop that thing?

* * *

><p>"So, it turns out Bolin brought chocolate and marshmallows?" Mako says, "Because he's Bolin?"<p>

Korra turns to him. She can barely make him out in the darkness. She left the campsite minutes ago to stoop by the water stream, healing, as best she can, the patch of skin on her shoulder where the spirit ray nearly grazed her. If even being in proximity to that thing is enough to cause this much pain, she can't imagine the damage caused by an actual blast. _There is no 'damage'. You just get obliterated. _"I know you probably think we should head straight back to Republic City but the air bison needs to rest and we've been flying all day. If Kuvira catches up to us and it's tired we're all done for. We barely made it out with our lives today."

"Yeah, that makes sense."

Korra looks at him skeptically. "It does?" she sighs and sits by the stream. Mako sits next to her. The silence between them has become comfortable with the passage of time. Maybe it's a new chapter in their lives. Years ago she had a crush on him, loved him, but there was always tension. They were hotheaded and stubborn, they both needed to be right. "I thought you came by to scold me."

"When have I ever scolded you?"

"How about all the time? 'Oh, are you sure that's a good idea, Korra?' and how about selling me out to President Raiko about the United Forces fleet?"

"I didn't sell you out. It was a bad idea." He sighs, throwing the small bag of marshmallows to the side. "Hey, we have enough people to fight. Let's not fight each other."

Korra pulls her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and settling her chin down. She sighs. "You're right. Ugh." She squeezes her eyes shut, hearing the sound of that awful blast. "Mako, what are we going to do? This is really bad." She looks through the small thicket of trees to see Asami and Bolin. They glance their way now and then, keeping close to the small campfire that won't be enough to give them away. "What if resting is a mistake? Maybe I _should_ risk the air bison being tired."

"You can't second guess yourself. Resting and not resting isn't going to buy us the kind of time we need to build something that can stand up to _that_. Even if it did…" he shakes his head. "We've all said that no one is comfortable creating a weapon like that. We can't always fight fire with fire. Sometimes we have to use something else."

"I'm open to suggestions."

"You're the Avatar. And you have us. We all put our heads together, we'll figure something out." Mako says. He sits forward, his fingers trailing through the stream of water. "So… I get now why you wrote Asami and not me."

Korra blinks and looks at him. "You do?"

"Yeah. My letters were pretty boring. Everything was without you around. We were never too good at talking, were we?" He looks at her and Korra feels heat crawling up her cheeks. They were better at other things. "It's too bad because I really like the way things are between us now. I shouldn't have been angry that you didn't write. That was… immature. I'm sorry."

Korra bites her lower lip, her fingers tickling along the blades of grass. "You don't have to apologize," she says quietly. "It was crummy of me not to write."

"It's not like I was missing anything. You're not exactly a wordsmith. Better at action and hitting things."

"Hey." She shoves him.

"Point proven." He laughs, coming to a sitting again. Mako takes everything seriously. He rarely laughs. The sound is refreshing and Korra takes the moment to appreciate this, to acknowledge that later, this talk by the stream will be a pleasant memory. The stream trickles by. "So… you and Asami…?"

Her heart skips a beat. "Me… and Asami what?"

He looks at her. "Come on."

"… What?"

Mako frowns and suddenly he looks like the grumpy guy she's used to spending time with, the no-nonsense beat cop who has no time for any bull. "Fine. You don't have to talk to me about it. Kind of weird anyway, right? You're my ex-girlfriends. But I see how you two are around each other. And I see the difference now between Asami from when you're here and Asami when you were away. It's like night and day."

Korra's face flushes. "Oh." Asami told her some about that time. How she threw herself into work. Korra somehow never put together that being busy and being alone were different things. To hear it from Mako… she closes her eyes and berates herself again for being gone so long.

"That's all you have to say? 'Oh'?"

"It's not your business," she snaps. She sees the wounded look on his face, covered up instantly and shakes her head. "Sorry, I just mean…" she takes a breath. "Mako… I know I shut you out. For years. Things were really hard for me for a while. That's why I didn't write. And maybe I look normal. Some days I feel normal, but not always." She bites her tongue. "Whatever I feel for Asami… some part of me can't help but think I'd be holding her back. Or that maybe I'll never be really ready for a relationship again."

Mako doesn't skip a beat. "Maybe you're just scared. There's a big fight coming up. The last one was pretty scary." He gives her a lopsided smile. "Asami's great. And an adult. So maybe the two of you should make those decisions together, right? And if you want to wait until this is all over to start things or feel ready, sure. Do it on your own time."

"That's…" Korra stares hard at him. "That… actually makes sense." She leans over and gives him a peck on the cheek. "Thanks, Mako." She stands and snatches up the bag of marshmallows. "We're going to win this. I won't let Kuvira have Republic City."

Mako climbs to his feet. "That's what I'm talking about."

* * *

><p>"So… you two," Bolin looks between Mako and Korra as they come out of the forest. "Again?" He looks to Asami. "It's like a ping pong match, isn't it? Don't worry, it'll come back your way again. Mako," he gets up and wraps an arm around his shoulder, "maybe I should teach you about the wonders of settling down. Like me and Opal? We have this thing that's transcended space and time. Three years, pretty much! Who else can say that?"<p>

Asami and Korra exchange smiles.

Mako shoves Bolin away. "Why don't you shut up and make us some s'mores?"

"On it!" Bolin takes the bag from Korra and begins to spear the marshmallows on the collection of twigs he and Asami gathered while Korra and Mako were at the stream. Mako glances at the women before shaking his head apologetically and kneeling beside Bolin, beginning to unwrap several bars of chocolate, Bolin's idea of food for their mission.

Asami takes Korra's wrist, notices the way her heart seems to jump to her throat at her touch. "I'm stealing Korra for a few minutes," she tells the brothers.

Bolin elbows Mako. "Gossip time. Try not to fight, girls!" he lifts a small boulder of earth between himself and Mako before Mako can strike. "You're _unbelievable_, bro," he hisses, "they're best friends…!"

Asami looks at them, smiles before tugging Korra between a collection of trees, slightly further of where she'd just been with Mako. When they're out of earshot she speaks. "So, putting the moves on Mako, are you? Feels like old times." The panic on Korra's face is so genuine that Asami almost feels bad. Almost.

"That was another joke, right? Like earlier with that 'wow, that mecha is the coolest thing I've ever seen' thing?"

"Fine. But you have to admit that under any other circumstance you'd be in awe of how amazing it is. I wonder how she controls it," Asami says. What do those blueprints look like? No doubt she could learn a few things from its construction. If Bataar crafted it—and from what Bolin says, it must be Bataar, then he's a talented engineer beyond measure.

"I don't care how she controls it. We have to take it out."

"We'll find a way." She abandons the notion of talking about the mecha's properties. Impressive as it is, Korra's no engineer and they don't share that interest. Asami shifts her focus, her fingertips hovering over the shoulder Korra was massaging earlier. "I saw you healing. Has it helped at all?"

"It doesn't feel like it's on fire anymore. That's a start."

Asami presses a kiss to it. Her flesh is hot beneath her lips. Korra hisses softly. Asami is ready to apologize when Korra kisses her, pressing her against a tree. Asami returns it, her heart drumming as hard as the first time their lips touched. Korra's kisses are more often than not, passionate and a little desperate, like that of a soldier going to war. This time they're all soldiers. War is around the corner. "On the other hand," Asami says when they separate, "_I _feel like I'm on fire." Korra laughs softly and Asami kisses her again and then again until she clears her throat and separates from the Avatar, afraid her fingers will get carried away and slip beneath Korra's clothing or start to pull them away altogether. "So… what were you and Mako talking about?"

"He knows about us." Korra says. Asami can't hide her surprise. "I didn't tell him. He figured it out. Something about your world having color again now that I've returned." Asami smiles. So, there's that cocky Avatar she knew so long ago. Asami knew she was there buried somewhere. Korra takes her arm when Asami playfully tries to push her. "Hope that's okay…?"

"What _is_ 'us'?"

"Um. Best friends? Best friends who make out? Aaaaand feeeeeeel…. things?"

Best friends who make out and feel things. Not eloquently put but not wrong either. Despite Korra's speech in the office there's nothing official about them. They spend as much time together as they can, which hasn't been much with what they've both got going on and the upcoming war. Korra sleeps on the factory couch some nights, waiting for any free minute Asami might have. Sometimes she gasps herself to consciousness, her cheeks darkening to have been caught in a nightmare. _It's all right. It was a dream._ And even if the words don't soothe, a kiss, in that darkened factory, is enough to prompt Korra's lips to move against hers, to ease her back to sleep. Maybe not giving what they have a name, not giving it a status, makes it impervious.

"Was that all right?" Korra asks anxiously when Asami says nothing.

"Yes, of course."

Korra seems to relax. Some of the tension slips from Asami's body as well. "So Kuvira's no joke." All the tension comes sweeping back. "She's got an army and a big ass mecha with a super weapon." Asami takes a breath. Yes. The mecha would have been troubling without that weapon. The two combined… She wonders what it's made of. If it's metal, maybe all they'll need are metal benders. Kuvira's a metal bender, it would stand to reason that the mecha is as well. But given how many metal benders there are in the earth kingdom, it would seem an unnecessary risk to use something that could be manipulated by the Avatar. "Are you worried?" Korra asks.

"A little." A lot. She wishes she could say 'not at all' but who'd believe that? "That's a really powerful weapon. We don't have anything that can match it. Our only option will be to dismantle it somehow." Korra nods grimly. "And I'm thinking that it probably isn't metal. It might be made of something else. Something people can't bend. At least, it should be, if Kuvira's smart."

"How does that affect things?"

"I'm not sure. Hopefully it'll take out the element of surprise, if we have to go up against it."

"That's something," Korra says. "I wouldn't have thought of it. Big mecha should be made of metal. Maybe the insides are different. I can hope?" Korra kisses her softly. "We should get back. We've been away for a while and we have a long few days ahead of us. We should rest."

They walk back together, their fingertips brushing, Asami wanting nothing more than to take her hand. The gesture, so innocent, so easy to misunderstand as simple friendship, strikes her as so much more intimate than a kiss.

"I really hope I don't have nightmares tonight," Korra seems to whisper under her breath, looking apprehensively at Mako and Bolin.

"Everyone has nightmares, Korra. It's nothing to be embarrassed about."

Korra looks at her gratefully, despite how uncertain she appears. Bolin jumps to his feet, waving several sticks of s'mores at them.

* * *

><p>The naval ships spark like tinder and explode. They watch from the factory, horrified. Asami's knuckles go white. Kuvira and the mecha are at the front lines, pointing the weapon directly to the ground forces where Korra is at, unless Raiko bows to her.<p>

Raiko surrenders Republic City. Asami knows she shouldn't be grateful.

Mako's hand covers hers. "She'll be back. She won't turn herself in."

Asami nods and hopes it's true, hopes Kuvira doesn't decide to exercise excessive force just to prove a point. She claps her hands over her head. "We have to get those hummingbirds running. Back to work, everyone."

She can't just sit now.

* * *

><p>Asami jumps when a hand settles between her shoulders, turning swiftly and nearly setting Korra's face on fire with the blowtorch. She quickly shuts it off, sharing a brief, fierce embrace with her. "I'm so glad you're okay," she says when they pull apart. "I was worried you might turn yourself over."<p>

Korra's pale, grim but determined. The factory is bustling and alive with noise, hammers and drills pounding things into place, putting the finishing touches on the hummingbirds. "I'm no good to Republic City if I'm taken captive. The potential for destruction…" she takes a breath. "How are the hummingbirds coming along?"

"Another hour, tops, and they'll all be ready to go."

"Great," a faint smile graces her lips. "It'll be a big help. I have to find the others. We need a plan to stop that thing. I'll see you later." She squeezes Asami's wrist and goes without a look back.

* * *

><p>The beam cuts through the factory like a hot knife through butter. The air goes out of Asami. One hummingbird blows and then another. The walls begin to crumble and she stares helplessly, listens to the screeches and groans of the factory as it falls around her. <em>Move, move, move!<em>

She recognizes the voice but can't put a name to it. All that work, gone. Kuvira's found them. They're done for. An arm wraps around her waist. The floor grows further away as she sees a steal beam slam down where she stood only moments ago.

Then they're outside. The air is remarkably fresh and cool. It takes moments to smell the fire, to see the smoke and the rubble. Her factory. Her home. Gone. Korra releases her. "Snap out of it!" she taps her face gently until Asami sees her. "I need you to focus," she tells her, "I won't be able to get my head in the game unless I know yours is. Okay?" Asami nods. Okay. "This isn't over. We can't give up." Asami nods again.

Varrick points out that the hummingbirds have been destroyed. That the air benders are on their own. Asami takes a breath, hope comes with it. "There are prototypes back at the office." It's something. Something is better than nothing.

* * *

><p>The city screams in protest. Explosions fill the air. The city is shrouded in smoke and fire. The prototypes need more work. Asami makes sure to check and double-check everything. The hydraulics system is up and running as it should. Now it's a matter of converting the welding torch into a plasma saw.<p>

Korra and the airbenders will provide cover support. They go, with Korra and Asami only exchanging glances as goodbyes. The day seems endless and each parting another push of luck. "She'll be fine," Hiroshi tells Asami. Asami looks at him. He's slipping into the Sato industries suit. It only seems fitting. This is the company he built and he may be the one to save Republic City. It's strange being at the factory with him, where they both once worked together. It's good seeing him out of his drab prison garb. She's overwhelmed by how much she has missed him. "You always get a line right here," his thumb grazes along her brow, "when you're worried. But the Avatar is powerful. She'll return."

Asami doesn't know what to say. So she says "let's get to work," instead of responding.

They do. He's a genius. She hates how things worked out, even if she can't say that she hates him anymore. She wonders if she ever did or if it was only anger clouding her judgment. She's sorry for all the time they spent without speaking. She should have worked sooner to reconcile what happened between them. Her eyes sting thinking of the wasted opportunity. He fiddles with the wires of the suit, noticing. "She'll come back," he says again.

"That's not…" And she realizes that he has no reason to think that she could spill tears for him, given their strained relationship throughout the years. "I'm glad Lin brought you," she says instead. He smiles, his eyes crinkling in the corners in a way she hasn't seen in too long. "If we stop that mecha giant, it will all be because of you."

"You're the one who designed these incredible suits. It's great to be working together again."

His hand covers hers. Some part of her feels like she's a child again, as if they didn't experience years apart. She always sought his approval so desperately, even if she never had to give it to him. He loved her unconditionally. Maybe, like Korra, he had a dark period too, a different sort of poison that made him ill, that made him do the things he did. "I love you, Dad." It seems important to tell him now, on a day when the city is on fire, on a day when she might die.

"I love you, too." He pats her hand and she reaches into the hummingbird to hug him. His skin smells of soap and beneath it, the musty smell of older people. Strange how parents grow old, strange when you realize they can die. When you're young, parents seem immortal, unstoppable. They pull away. "The plasma saw is a little finicky, so I'll make the cut on the mecha. You'll navigate. Sound like a deal?"

"Deal." She hops into the pilot's seat. Below, Varrick proposes to Zhu Li. She and her father watch in silence and Asami feels her eyes watering again. Maybe she's worried, maybe she's happy, maybe she's both. She finds herself standing and clapping when Zhu Li accepts. Maybe once this is all over they'll start their own company and leave hers alone. She smiles to herself. Try as she may to be cynical, she's really only happy for them. What better thing than love to flourish during war?

* * *

><p>The mecha is destroying everything in its path.<p>

The air is cold and sweltering in one. The sky blue and patchy here, with tendrils of smoke there. Korra spots the hummingbirds. She smiles, her heart swelling. Okay. Here's their shot. The mecha doesn't make it easy. As soon as they land it immediately attempts to swat them away. The excitement of moments ago turns to worry, her guts twisting painfully. They _are_ nothing but mosquitos to that thing. If its hand connects…

_Don't think. Do._

She runs back to the river. She knows what she has to do. The sounds of the city being smashed behind her fill her ears. She tries to control her breathing and summons a wall of water, lifting it higher than she even knew was possible, snapping it into ice just as quickly. The mecha stops but one of the hummingbirds goes down, splatting against a building and going up in flames.

_It isn't Asami. _How do you know? _It isn't Asami, keep focused. _Soon, she spots that she's right, that Varrick and Zhu Li have parachuted down. She looks at the mecha, whirring and straining against the ice. Chunks are breaking free and there isn't enough water to try the same thing again. Hiroshi and Asami. If this doesn't work, they're done. If this doesn't work, Republic City falls and then, the rest of the world.

The others have caught up to her now and they watch, paralyzed, as the hummingbird suit cuts into the destructive machine. They watch in horror as the mecha busts free, the hand swatting down, the sickening crunch of metal. Korra's heart stops. She searches the sky in desperation. A speck. A parachute. It has to be Asami. It has to be. If Hiroshi is half the man Asami thinks he is, it's Asami. She can't think otherwise. She can't function otherwise. She has to believe it.

"Hiroshi's plan worked. There's our opening."

She has to go, go, go.

* * *

><p>A spike of hot pink light pierces through the mecha's chest, followed by another and then another. Asami lifts an arm to shield her eyes. Korra's inside that thing. Korra's fighting Kuvira inside that thing. She's thinking that when it explodes. She brings a hand to her chest, her fingers digging so tight, it feels as if she's clawed into her heart.<p>

* * *

><p>The boulder smashes into her head and Korra falls back, numb, before pain, hot and throbbing pulses across her temple, spreading. Kuvira races into the forest. She's hazy, shaky. Korra's vision is unsteady. The dark Avatar stands before her, disapproving, chain clinking gently in the wind. Korra squeezes her eyes shut, rolls onto her side with a gasp. <em>Get up. Get up. You have to get up. <em>

She forces herself to her knees, to her feet, the dark Avatar turns, following Kuvira into the forest. Korra walks, drags, forces herself into a jog. She has to get to her. She has to get to her.

* * *

><p>Kuvira wants death. It doesn't seem to matter whose. Hers or Korra's but she wants it. Korra stares up at the spirit energy cannon. There's so much she still wants to do. She thinks of her father and mother, she thinks of Asami and their friends. No. No. She will not die here.<p>

The spirit cannon fires and Korra leaps. The forest is coming alive, aglow in energy. The cannon fires uncontrollably. "You're destroying the city! Shut it down!"

Kuvira's eyes open wide. "I can't!" she falls away from it, landing hard on the ground. Her expression is pure terror, regret. No more death. Not her. Not the city. Not Kuvira. Not even Kuvira.

The cannon fires wild, the beam cutting a path to Kuvira. Korra throws herself in front of it, in front of her, not thinking of how it burned to be near it before. Not thinking at all, just reacting. The ray is upon them. She lifts her hands at the last possible moment, the Avatar state flows around her, a bubble of protection to keep away the most destructive force the world has ever seen.

"Just let it go!" Kuvira shouts. "Just let me die!"

Korra's feet sink into the ground from the force, her arms strain. It would be easier to protect only herself. It would guarantee that one of them survives but no. She can't. She won't. She has to save them both.

The edges of the world, of her vision, fade, fade, until there's only blinding, burning light.

* * *

><p>Kuvira wakes in Korra's arms and races away as if having touched fire. Korra falls back into a field of flowers as Kuvira looks around wildly. She's frightened. Is she scared of her? Of death? There are worse things than death. There was a time Korra wanted it, begged silently for it. Not anymore. There's too much to live for.<p>

Kuvira is lost. Kuvira who did everything in her power to restore order in Korra's absence. Maybe Kuvira is her responsibility. Maybe Korra is the one to bear responsibility for her sins. At least some of it. Kuvira did what she could not. What would have happened if no one had stepped in to help the Earth Kingdom while she was gone? What if a tyrant, far, far worse than Kuvira had stepped in to take her place?

"Why would you save my life?" Kuvira demands. "After everything I did to you."

"You saved my dad." With her hair loose, Kuvira looks younger, vulnerable. It's hard to believe that this woman created an empire, that this woman once terrified Korra. They're not all that different. How can she fear herself? The dark Avatar blinks in front of Kuvira, waivers and then disappears again. "And… I guess… I see a lot of myself in you."

"We're nothing alike!"

"Yes, we are."

They argue. Kuvira cries. Korra gets it. She understands her, admires her, in a way. She can't be angry, despite Kuvira's actions. Hurt and anger, helplessness are the precursors to so much chaos. They sit a while in the field of flowers, Kuvira using her palm to wipe the trail of tears from her cheek.

"I've hurt so many when all I wanted was to protect my people," Kuvira huddles into herself, shaking. "What have I done?"

Korra scoots closer, kneels before her, breathing in the scent of flowers, the soothing energy of the spirit portal washing over her. "You can recover from this," Korra tells her, "you can make amends for what you've done."

Kuvira's eyes are green, are darker than Asami's, stony, stormy, fierce. "From where? A jail cell? My life is over."

"You don't know that." Korra stands and stretches a hand out to her. "Come on. We have to go back. Everyone's probably worried and we have to see what that blast did to Republic City. Are you ready?"

Kuvira glowers at the flowers around her before slapping a strong hand into Korra's, allowing Korra to pull her to her feet. Kuvira stumbles and Korra wraps one of her arms around her shoulder. Together, they trudge towards the spirit portal.

* * *

><p>A quiet celebration sweeps through Republic City, subdued only by the exhaustion in everyone's bones, of how much they have to rebuild. Korra is giddy, bruised, bloody, happy, sad.<p>

The night is suffused with a gentle energy that radiates in waves from the spirit portal. Korra takes Asami's hand and holds it the entire way back to Air Temple Island. Asami lets Korra hold her hand, but does not twine their fingers together, does not squeeze her hand back. A faint smile touches her lips because they won, they won and they're celebrating, they have to celebrate overcoming everything but her father is dead.

Korra leads Asami to her bedroom. Everyone knows they're to be left alone. As soon as the door slides shut, Asami crumbles. Korra wraps her arms around her shoulders. Asami sobs against her. Korra's heart aches for her, for the loss of Hiroshi and she realizes that love is a great responsibility, that it goes further than just the one that dwells in your heart.

* * *

><p>They dance and they dance and they dance.<p>

Korra, who should be a natural, spends much of Varrick and Zhu Li's wedding, apologizing and flushing, stepping on Asami's toes, losing her to Mako when her feet are in need of salvation.

It's been weeks since Kuvira's attack. Republic City is slowly moving away from crisis mode and the citizens are transitioning back into their lives. Korra has spent a great deal of her time moving around the city and finding ways to help. Asami has been distant and working non stop on rebuilding her factories. Korra has quietly kept her company and has not prodded. A funeral for Hiroshi was had, a quiet affair that everyone involved in stopping Kuvira's attack attended. Korra walked Asami back to the estate, helping her into bed, climbing in beside her, an arm around her waist, holding her as she trembled.

Tonight is the first time in days they've acted a little like their old selves. There's a light inside of Korra, a seed sprung weeks ago, that is sprouting hope, promise, when she once felt things were so grey. Seeing Tenzin smile in his reassuring way makes her so happy it nearly brings tears to her eyes. He was worried for so long. Maybe he had reason to be. But they know now that it's better.

"I know I was in a pretty dark place after I was poisoned," she tells him, "but I finally understand why I had to go through all that. I needed to understand what true suffering was so I could become more compassionate to others. Even to people like Kuvira. If everything with Zaheer hadn't happened—I don't know that I could have prevented the destruction of Republic City. Maybe Kuvira would be dead… and it'd be some awful thing I had to carry with me for the rest of my life. People like her, people like Zaheer… they're worth saving. Even if they're wrong, even if we disagree. There's so much potential and good inside of them… so much they could offer the world… they shouldn't be struck down because they're out of balance."

"Those are strong words to live by," Tenzin touches her shoulder. "I'm so proud of you."

Korra has no words, only gratitude for him, for the kindness and patience he has so consistently given her. Asami comes and Korra doesn't hear what she says, what Tenzin says, can only feel her heart swell and overflow to see Asami again, despite that it's only been minutes.

They sit together, close, watching the golden light of the spirit portal. "Have your feet recovered?" Korra asks.

"Barely." Asami smiles. "I have a confession." Korra looks at her, startled, heart pounding. "Varrick wasn't really looking for a glider suit. I just really wanted you to myself for a while."

"Oh," Korra grins. "I've wanted that, too. With you." She grimaces. Why are words so hard around Asami? "Anyway, it sounds like something Varrick would do. Tenzin will just get the jump on him before he decides to try."

Her smile is gentle before her expression goes sad again. "I know things have been…" she licks her lips, eyebrows furrowed. "It was really hard losing my dad like that. I've been upset and I've been distant. I hope you know—" she stops again, her cheeks reddening. "Wow, I'm usually better at talking than this."

"It's okay." Korra says quietly.

"I hope you know … how happy I am that you're alive. When that mecha went off in the city—and then when that blast came from the forest. I thought my heart would stop. I couldn't even cry. It's like some part of me refused to believe it. Some part of me broke just imagining it. There's no way… there's no way I could have handled losing you and my dad in the same day. But you were all right and I was so happy but my father was gone… my feelings were so strong in opposite directions it made me feel a little crazy. I needed some time. Thank you for just being _near_ me. You have no idea how much it helped, how much I appreciated it."

"You don't have to thank me for any of that. It's the least I could do for everything you've done for me throughout the years." She lifts a hand, wiping a stray tear from the corner of Asami's eye. "I'm the one who should be apologizing. I never did. I gave you a lot of excuses for being away but I never really apologized. I know you said that I never ask for anything but I have. I've asked you to be patient. I've asked you to forgive me. Even if I didn't ask out loud—"

"You don't have to ask for any of those things. I'm just glad you're here," she sniffles lightly and then laughs, sad yet joyful, "I'm just glad we're together."

"Me too." Korra breathes deeply. "So, what now? Back to the dance floor?"

"I'm kind of all danced out."

"Sorry," Korra grumbles. "I'm not usually that awful. I was nervous and you look even more gorgeous than usual. And shouldn't I be the one leading?"

"Why? Because you're the Avatar?"

"I don't know, I just think you get away with too much because of the height thing."

Asami smiles. "You're ridiculous. No dancing. No work tonight. Honestly, after everything that's happened in the last few months, I could use a vacation."

"Then let's do it! Let's go on a vacation, just the two of us! Anywhere you want!"

"Really?" Asami sounds surprised and Korra wonders if there's been some reservation on both of their ends, an unwillingness to believe that all of this is really happening between them. "Okay…" Korra releases a breath she didn't know she'd been holding. "I've always wanted to see what the Spirit World is like."

"Sounds perfect."

* * *

><p>They don't wait a moment longer.<p>

It only seems right that they leave on a night filled with love and celebration. Asami waits outside of Korra's door as she changes, grabs a backpack and fills it, the two of them going to the kitchen to pick out the foods they'll eat. They don't know how long they'll be gone and if not for Asami asking about nourishment in the spirit world, they might have forgotten altogether.

They return to the Sato estate and repeat the same process, Korra waiting anxiously outside Asami's door as she changes out of her dress, removes her earrings and puts on something more appropriate for adventuring. She packs some changes of clothing and they both do another kitchen raid before heading to the spirit portal.

The closer they get, the more Asami is overcome with a feeling of pure love, a sensation so clear and clean that it nearly brings tears to her eyes. It isn't too long before the spirit portal is within reach. Spirits move through the air, whispering past them and Asami smiles as their joyful energy brushes past her, seeming to push any negative thoughts and feelings out of her.

The spirit portal hums. She's so nervous and excited it's almost impossible to stand still. She and Korra exchange looks. "You sure about this," Korra asks. "Just you and me in the spirit world." Korra's smile hangs by a thread, waiting, Asami thinks, for some last rejection. "You know what this means."

Asami takes her hand. "I do."

Korra's fingers thread through hers and together, they walk to the spirit portal. The light is golden, beautiful. They face each other, hands clasped, eyes meeting. Korra's smile is radiant and reassuring.

Asami has no fear, there is no room for it with all the love brimming between them. They step close, refusing to relinquish each other's hands, their lips coming together in a promise, in anticipation of what's to come. A warm, loving breeze sweeps over them. Together, they leave Republic City behind.

* * *

><p>AN: LONG chapter!

So I lied and this story DOESN'T follow immediately after they go into the spirit world. Why? Because I couldn't figure out a way that worked -for me- to end it that way. So what I'm going to do is write a story (rated M, sorry kiddos!) that immediately follows this one and starts off in the spirit world. Of course this will mean fun adult adventures BUT, just because this story comes to a close doesn't mean Korra and Asami get happily ever after forever (at least not without making them suffer first. I do like that kind of thing). I have a story in mind and I just have to wrap my head around it as it is somewhat ambitious, even for me. I set up the beginning for it in this last chapter (sort of), so hopefully I can get to it soon but don't expect anything too soon (those who decide to follow up on it). Korra isn't fully well, no relationship is ever fully perfect, and let's not forget that the Avatar never really gets a break.

I hope this last chapter was at least a little enjoyable for all of you. Major, major thanks to all you reviewers, anonymous or not anonymous! Your encouragement was amazing. I am very lucky.

Also, whatever, I wanted them to have smores.


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